FMIL: The guest everyone groans about?

posted 2 months ago in Beehive
Post # 2
586 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

She needs to be told exactly why you aren’t inviting her.

Shes never had any consequence to her actions. 

Post # 3
162 posts
Blushing bee

I’d give her an earlier time to show up. Consider even making her own special invitation with an earlier time. Most families of the couple come early anyway, for pictures and whatnot. This way she either shows up at the right time, or will have time to sober up before the ceremony.

I would also discuss with the restaurant’s manager what could happen (put it in terms of property damage) and make it clear that everyone on staff that day should know what she looks like, and that she is not to be served more than two drinks. I’d even assign someone to call ahead and remind them again that day (do not overserve lady in blue) and speak to the waitstaff so you don’t have to worry or be watching her. Good luck!

Post # 4
252 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I too have a ‘problematic’ mother – I’ve learned in life and especially in wedding planner that you can’t control her behaviour.  Tell her to arrive 15min earlier than she should and perhaps remind her that this isn’t a heavy drinking event. You could even so far as to give the bartender a head’s up.  From there, her behaviour is on her.  Can you designate a close friend/relative to be the watchdog – he/she can pull her aside for a private word if she starts getting out of control, to remind her that this day is for you two and that it’s not a rager.  

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