(Closed) FMIL wants to wear black to the wedding. Ugh.

posted 8 years ago in Family
  • poll: Should I tell my FMIL it's okay to wear black to the wedding?

    Yes. Let her wear black.

    No. Tell her that black is NOT okay!

    Other (please explain)

  • Post # 17
    Member
    313 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I gave the Moms free range in what they were wearing to the wedding. My mom is still undecided, but Future Mother-In-Law is weary black dress pants ( she calls them palazzo pants or something…very flowy, almost looks like a long skirt) and a black and pink top. If she really wants to wear LBD I say go ahead, if you want her to standout a little maybe you could get her a nice Pashima or shawl to wear around her shoulder. Just saw your wedding is in June, but some Pashimas are really light.

    Post # 18
    Member
    786 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2014

    what style wedding are you having? I guess if its more casual, I could see how a black dress might not fit in. Our wedding is black tie and my mom is wearing the most GORGEOUS black gown ever. It definitely would not be a gown you would wear if you were in mourning or going to a funeral. But if everyone at your wedding is going to be in sun dresses and khakis, then perhaps a black gown wouldn’t work.

    Post # 19
    Member
    913 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    View original reply
    @natbug21:  Your mom looks awesome! Gorgeous dress.

    Post # 20
    Member
    5089 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    View original reply
    @natbug21:  My mom wore black to my wedding too! I thought she looked adorable.

    Of course, she also wore black to her OWN wedding to my stepdad. As did I, as her one attendent. So it’s safe to conclude she wasn’t trying to send me any kind of message by wearing it to my wedding!

    So I’m probably the wrong person to ask.

    Post # 22
    Member
    3771 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 1999

    Unless she shows up with a black veil over her face, it will be fine:)

    Post # 23
    Member
    63 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    I would say let her wear what she wants.  However, I voted no because traditionally, a mother in law wearing black signals to the guests that she doesn’t approve of her son’s choice in spouse.  =/  I don’t think this is the case anymore, but some less tactful people might start talking if they see her in black.

    Post # 24
    Member
    532 posts
    Busy bee

    I think black is a flattering and classy choice. I don’t think she will look like she is in mourning!

    Post # 25
    Member
    1061 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    I didn’t read any of the other posts, but my Mother-In-Law wore black and I thought she looked great! Very classy and didn’t clash with anything.  In fact, a number of members of DH’s family wore black…

    Post # 26
    Member
    1269 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I’m with the “let her wear it” crowd but I might try shoppping together or maybe ask her what she’s wearing with it. Head to toe black might really look like mourning, but if it’s a LBD with, I don’t know how to put it, upbeat? accessories then it’s fine.

    Post # 27
    Member
    7605 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    View original reply
    @SarahSmilesDec28:  You looked so gorgeous!  Is it me being weird, or does your Mother-In-Law sort of look photoshopped in?  Lol.

    Post # 28
    Member
    1837 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    lol my fmil is the one who is going crazy that i might pick black as a color.

    Post # 29
    Member
    1061 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    View original reply
    @Juliepants:  I think it is because there is a tiny gap between her and Father-In-Law.  He is the most awkward person and would not listen to the photog when they kept telling to be uncomfortably close with the person he was standing beside!  Ugh.

    Post # 30
    Member
    7309 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    All but 2 of our female guests, including my Maid/Matron of Honor, chose mto wear a black dress to our wedding. I really don’t see what the big deal is.

    Post # 31
    Member
    344 posts
    Helper bee

    Her not buying a new dress has nothing to do with how she feels about your wedding!

    My son is getting married and I may wear something I already own if it looks good on me. 🙂  ……and I am thrilled about their marriage.

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