(Closed) folo-up Q– thank yous signed off on by you only or both of you?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1602 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

i have the nicer hand writing, so i’ll probably just put something like, “with love, name and name”…

Post # 4
2058 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

You close w/ both of your names.  FH and I have a deal – – I write the thank you cards for my family and friends and he writes the thank you cards for his family and friends…That way we’re both invloved – – we’ll close signing both of our names. 

Post # 5
573 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

We split the note writing (yay!). Each of us mentioned the other in the note, but we signed just our own name.

Post # 6
13099 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

Sign them from both of you – I’m actually signing my name and then waiting for Fiance to come home and sign his name to them as well!

Post # 8
7173 posts
Busy Beekeeper

The thank you note topics today got me thinking about this exact thing too.

For our joint friends & family – we’ll both add notes – it’s what we currently do now for thank you notes – and so we’ll treat it no differently for the wedding (or – at least, that’s what I’m hoping Fiance will go along with! haha!)

For only my friends that he doesn’t really have a relationship with – I’ll have him sign his name and vice versa for his (meaning, he’ll write the note, I’ll sign my name).

Post # 9
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I just wrote both of our names instead of making my husband sign them all.

Post # 11
52 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I believe that miss manners suggests only signing your own name on thank you notes (her thought being that the thank you note is written by one person, so only one person should sign). I think that it would be perfectly correct of you to include your husband’s sentiments in the thank you note, but only sign your own name.

With that said, I think it is a personal choice and I don’t think that anyone will think twice about whether you sign only your own name or both of your names. 🙂

Post # 12
516 posts
Busy bee


I think I understand what you’re asking here.  My opinion is that it is most appropriate for the writer of the note to express thanks for both spouses. 

So instead of writing “I love the serving dish, it’s just what we needed,” one can (and probably should for wedding gift purposes) write “John and I are so appreciative, we were both excited when we opened the box and saw our much-desired weed-whacker.”

But honestly, as long as the note gets written, you’re in good shape : )


Post # 13
1699 posts
Bumble bee

What you are doing is correct, JoeBeth. You wouldn’t normally sign someone else’s name to a document; you shouldn’t do it in personal letters either. It is a little different with husband and wife — you do frequently act on one another’s behalf, especially socially. It’s for that reason that many wives do feel free to sign “John and Jane” on Christmas cards and whatever. But the higher principle is that the signature represents the letter writer and when you speak for your husband you are overt that you are doing so — just as hou have described.

The topic ‘folo-up Q– thank yous signed off on by you only or both of you?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors