(Closed) For ladies who MUST have larger rings…..

posted 7 years ago in Rings
Post # 47
Member
764 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

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@polyblonde:  Amen!!!! should there be a thread for “why did you choose a smaller stone?” or “why do you love a small stone?” smh…

Gosh …. I hate how ppl have to feel bad for what their personal taste or wants are … if your partner can/wants to give it to you then thats YOUR business …

 

Post # 49
Member
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

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@BeautyBox:  I agree with you and polyblonde. 

As DH says, great googly-moogly, lol!  

Diana

Post # 52
Member
1146 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

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@BeautyBox:  Seriously!!! I don’t mean to sound bratty but I am just so over the double standard.

It’s acceptable to post questions about “reasoning” behind larger rings which implies wanting a larger ring must mean you’re so superficial you would turn down a proposal because of a small one.

Well, it’s possible to be an extremely giving and caring person with LOTS of people that believe you’re one of the least materialistic people they know AND still want and get a large diamond ring.

It’s acceptable to make comments and state assumptions about smaller rings that backhand larger rings — such as “well, i have small fingers and a large diamond just looks gaudy” or “well, we thought it was silly and irresponsible to spend money on a ring we could put towards a house” or “well, i went for quality over quantity…a lot of large rocks probably have shitty clarity” or “Large diamonds imply new money, or white trash, or whatever” etc etc. (just a few comments I have seen on the Bee).

Well, it’s possible to have very small fingers and not want a small diamond. It’s possible to be able to purchase a large, high quality diamond and still have money for everything else you can want in life. And, its possible to go for size AND high quality. It’s also possible for your ring to indicate absolutely nothing about what your life is actually like.

But — if you were to insult or make a negative comment about someone’s ring for being too small for your liking….that is not acceptable. I can’t imagine the responses to a post asking why on earth you’d ever want a small diamond. Or, to make assumptions that “oh, well since you purchased a small diamond you must not be able to afford anything bigger.” Can you imagine? Yet, people state all the time that a large diamond purchase probably means the buyer had to finance it or hold off on buying cars or houses or trips. Both assumptions are ridiculous….

Or, if someone made the statement “well, we thought it was cheap and childish looking to buy a small diamond, so we got a large one.” For the rcord, i DONT think it’s cheap and childish looking to have a small diamond — I am just making the point that back handed comments are acceptable when it’s a large diamond being called something negative, such as gaudy, but regarding a small one — there’s no way such a negative and insulting statement would fly without all kinds of nasty comments in response!

ETA: Sorry, OP, not all of this is directed at you. It’s more a general observation about how people act about rings on this board and it bugs me when I happen to see it.

Post # 53
Member
764 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

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@MrsEME:   I really wasn’t saying you or anyone on THIS thread was nasty … nor am I offended at all …

saying Gosh was b/c I’ve seen over and over on here comments made about having a big stone or wanting etc being looked at as bad, negative, not right, greedy and the list goes on …

it wasn’t directed to YOU and I guess my strong choice of words made you feel as though I took offence to your post .. no biggy… I was just saying it’s kind of annoying about the women that DO make those kind of comments.

Post # 54
Member
764 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

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@MrsEME:  Not at all hun … i didn’t think that  at all …I was just making a comment on what i have seen in other post … so far your post has been very kind tone :-)… see my other comment its my explanation πŸ™‚  

I LOVE LV too ! πŸ™‚

Post # 55
Member
1146 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

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@BeautyBox:  Yes. exactly. It’s just bizarre.

Post # 57
Member
6535 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

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@MrsEME:  I’m the same! I LOVEEEEEEE bags but about clothes I could care less πŸ™‚ My e-ring is more or less the same size as yours!

Post # 58
Member
764 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

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@polyblonde:  Amen to you 100x’s !!!! you just said everything i have thought since being on here , but never had the energy to put together such a thought out response !!! thank you πŸ™‚

and lets not forget the other comment “humble brag” like WTF … I can’t ….

if I had a SMALL stone and posted a thread “is my ring small?” i would get …

“no darling , your ring is amazing”

“OMG its perfert for you”

you would never see ” you tick me off” or “humble brag” or “i feel bad for your SO” and the list goes on once again LOL

Post # 59
Member
7265 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I don’t know that I would have flat out said no, but I’ll be very honest and say that when I look at some people’s rings I think in my head “I would NOT be happy if DH had propsed with that”. It’s ALL about *personal taste*. My ring is not huge by any means, but it’s over 1 ct, of very good quality, and is much larger than that of most of my friends. We were not young when we got engaged, both established in our careers – while most of our friends got married right out of college with little to no money. 

 

We’d been together 12 years when we got engaged – and in that time I put getting married on hold because DH’s career needed to come first. I was ready to get married 6 years before we finally got engaged, but I was willing to wait for it to be the right time for him. *To me* I would have been incredibly offended to know he had all that time to save and plan and then purchased a small ring. 

 

I personally just don’t like the look of small rings FOR ME. I really could care less what other people choose for themselves, because frankly, it’s none of my business. 

 

Having said that, even though I do love my ring, I think there will be an upgrade in the future to something even larger than what I have.

 

Post # 60
Member
751 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013 - old cheese factory

i upgraded my ring this year (2 year engagement). i hated the look of my old ring with only one wedding band so i wanted 2. but then if i did that it would be around 1k. so we decided instead of getting me a wedding band we would upgrade my ring. (he spent $400 on my origional 1/2 cttw) i am so glad we went this route instead of buying the bands. maybe later in life i will get a wedding band to go with my new ring.


comparison old to new. old 1/2 cttw new 1cttw. and better diamonds. idk if my old ring is just THAT dirty or if they just arent very well cut/color clarity.

Post # 61
Member
751 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013 - old cheese factory

i didnt need an upgrade, it was his choice. i am so glad we did because the new ring is a much better quality.

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