(Closed) For the bees who ring shopped with their man- how?

posted 9 years ago in Rings
Post # 47
296 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Initially SO asked for ideas  from me because he had no idea how the whole thing works. He didn’t know if he should pick it out or if I should or if we should do it together. I sent him links to styles I thought I loved… I really wanted a moissanite but he wasn’t so sure about purchsing one without seeing it in person. I found a jeweler who had them (pretty much the only independant jeweler in the ATL metro area that has ’em it seems!!) and we went to look and see if that was really the stone for us. I took one look at the case and fell in LOVE with one, so I tried it on and that was that. Funny thing is, it is pretty different from wwhat I thought I loved. I thought I wanted a round stone in a halo setting, but ended up loving a radiant cut in a vintage-inspired setting with delicate side stones! I asked him what he thought and he turned to the jeweler and asked about his layaway policy  🙂  (shh don’t tell….but I know that it is in our apartment now! Waiting to see when I get it!!)


Post # 48
259 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

One morning, and I’m talking like 3am in the morning, right before work, I busted out crying asking about if he was thinking marriage was in the cards for us. We had a good serious talk after that, with less crying. (Not a route I would suggest you go cause I still feel like a butt for busting down like that).

Weeks went by and I honestly did not bring it up again. But we went to the mall to look for a dress for me. We passed by a jewelry shop and he said you want to go in here? And I was like why? He said to look at rings of course. Talk about a surprise! I was like a kid in a candy store. He kept reminding it was just to look and see what I liked. We went to the well known stores and I didn’t really find anything that wow’d me. He knew from those stores what I didn’t want. Then as the mall was closing, we went to a lesser known chain. And the rings in there just amazed me but I knew instantly it was out of budget. Of course there was one, that when they let me put it on, I did not want to take it off.

Currently, that ring sits on my finger and it rarely comes off. He wanted to give me what I wanted and bless his heart he worked hard to get it.

Post # 49
53 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

We had always talked about marriage so it wasn’t an awkward conversation. I brought it up to him one night saying sometime before he buys a ring I wanted to go with him so we can look at the different styles, sizes, etc. He and I are both logical and realized that if he was going to spend that type of money on something I will wear forever he wanted to make sure that it was something I loved. I ended up basically picking out my setting with him but we had a great time every place we went and there was something always so romantic/fun about going. In the end it was the right decision for us becase what we originally thought we wanted was the complete opposite of what I fell in love with and ended up getting. I don’t regret it at all.

Post # 50
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Well he asked me to look up rings and show him ones I liked – I did but ended up finding that I kept coming back to pictures of blue diamond rings… I don’t know how that happened as I was looking at rubies not diamonds. I like colored stones more. So I said we should go to the jewler and look at them to see if I liked them in person and we did.

Post # 51
55 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I put the laptop infront of him one morning and said, “I want that one”.  He said “Do you want to go have a look?” I said Yes”

We went to the jewellers I had a look at it.  He said “Do you want it?”  I said “Yes”.

As easy and as simple as that lol!!

Post # 52
2973 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@bkrocks13:  I think it depends on the guy but I can only speak for me. 

I never considered going ring shopping WITH my SO… I never imagined it even before I met him. But he’s the kind of person who wants to give a person EXACTLY what they want. That’s important to him – to “get it right”. The conversation literally went like this:

Me: (jokingly asking) So when are you gonna make an honest woman outta me? (with an exaggerated southern accent)

Him: Well there are some things I need to do first… like get your ring size, know what style of ring you like, what kind of wedding band you want… what material do you want the ring to be made out of… because my jeweler asked me all of these things and I didn’t have any answers.

Me: (STUNNED) Oh! Well…I guess we can start looking at rings… I’ll get you some answers…never looked at rings before though.

Him: Ok, let’s do that while we’re in NY (we were on our way to NYC for a romantic weekend getaway).


End scene. lol

Post # 54
782 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

DH and I were always a “when we get married” couple. We knew as soon as we started dating that we wanted to be together forever, and marriage was on the table right from the start. In fact, it was only a couple weeks into our relationship that we started making plans for our future. We talked a lot and agreed that we definitely wanted to get married but that we wanted to wait until we were together a year before we got engaged.

We moved to another state and lived together, sharing finances and a household. We were definitely on the same page regarding our plans and future, so everything was pretty comfortable and easy. We had a clear idea of what we wanted, when, and how we were going to get there.

So as our one year anniversary approached, we were both excited and talking a lot about rings and weddings. The entire process was very open and comfortable, so it seemed perfectly natural to start ring shopping together. We went to a bunch of places, found the perfect ring, and he proposed a few days after it’d been cleaned and sized for us! It was one of the most amazing moments of my life, even though I’d chosen the ring and knew it was coming!


Post # 55
2973 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@bkrocks13:  No where notable. We stayed in midtown one block away from H. Stern and two blocks away from Zales. We were out walking around and just stopped in Zales since it was right there. I just wanted to get sized…then the sales associate made me look at styles… and my SO started asking all of these questions so after saying “we’re really doing this” to myself, I started paying attention. 

I have a simple style, so I immediately ruled out a ton of styles and went straight to solitaires with halos and simple solitaires. Surprisingly, I did not like a halo setting on my hand. I LOVE them on everyone else but once I put it on my hand, I was not blown away. I tried on a 1.2 ct round solitaire and instantly fell in love. 

Once we got home, I told him I loved the Neil Lane rings that I’ve seen online and wanted to try one on to compare. I tried it on and once again, the style just fell flat… and it wasn’t to my liking once it was on my hand. Love it in the case and on other people but it’s just not me. Went back to trying on a solitaire right there in Kay and the warm and fuzzy feeling returned. So we settled on a solitaire. 🙂

But he’s having it made through a personal jeweler and they used the Stuller website to shop for diamonds and settings.

Post # 56
80 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Why not send him a pic of the one you like?

Post # 57
142 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Not sure how it happened exactly. We’ve been together for 5 1/2 years and living together equally as long, and have pretty much known we wanted to get married. I think it started off with his mom taking me to look at rings at JCPenny’s for funsies, then Fiance wanting to see which ones we looked at for funsies, and then going to other stores to look. Honestly, since we already knew we were going to get married, the ring and proposal were more for the romantic gesture. He already knew the answer when he asked, and I already knew he was going to ask.

As for picking the ring out, we did that together. We actually went into the store looking at completely different rings, and found this one I have now and fell in love.

Post # 58
2203 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I told him what I wanted and I showed (e-mailed) him pictures of what I wanted.  I needed him to be CLEAR on what I wanted exactly because once you get in the store it can get REALLY confusing REALLY fast.  Soooo,  I said it is probably best if we went looking around because I love the look of the ring style in pics but who knows if I will like it on my finger.  At first he was hesitant cause he thought it would ruin the proposal but then he knew how upset I would be if he didn’t get something I liked.  So he quickly changed his mind and off we went.  I ended up picking out the exact ring I saw in pictures…nothing else even compared.  They wrote all the details and model number (not the right word) so that he couldn’t get it wrong when the time came!

Post # 59
7439 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

I am an Encore Bride (first marriage circa 1980), and in BOTH cases we went ring shopping together.

First time, it was because my Ex-H and I were fresh out of Uni and we had a very limited budget… he brought me along because he wanted to make sure we got something I liked.

This time round…

Mr TTR sprung a Marriage Proposal on me quite unexpectedly while we were on vacation… (altho Marriage was something we had talked about) and as we didn’t have a ring (he knew how important a ring was to me as a symbol… and as something I’d wear FOREVER and sooo it had to be something I loved completely).  So after “the Non-Proposal” (whole other story), I went ring browsing on my own to see what was out there, and what I might like.  It was easy after that initial visit, to then say, “Honey I went looking, and I’d like it if you went with me… I know the kind of thing I like, but I’d like your input”… and so that was it, we went together.

Now to be sure, nothing was cut & dry, or easy.  I had my requirements, he had his (budget etc).  And I am really glad that in the end we didn’t buy anything right off the bat… in the end we took 6 weeks to find THE RING that really represents both of us perfectly.

I couldn’t be happier.

Honestly, a lot different from my first marriage when I wasn’t that well educated about Diamonds (the 4 Cs …. 5, 6, or 7… if you include Conflict Free – Certified – and Cost)

The first time round, we went in with a budget and didn’t ask a lot of questions… altho I was very happy with my ring thru the 20+ years of my marriage, I look back now and realize how UNEDUCATED a consumer we both were… chances are pretty good that someone took advantage of us.

This time round… I know that didn’t happen, because it was US who were setting the parameters… not some sales clerk on commission

Hope this helps,


Post # 60
2635 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m one whot took things into her own hands and I proposed to my bf. He loved it and said “yes”! I absolutely had to pick my own ring because I wanted it to suit my taste so I did the ring shopping myself for the most part. When I had narrowed it down to two, he came with me for a quick check. He didn’t seem to enjoy being at the jewellers…maybe because of the pressure they sometimes put on men (because men usually pay). He did want to have an input though, and we payed half and half 😉

Post # 61
894 posts
Busy bee

@bkrocks13:  It was a really fun experience to shop together! I really, really enjoyed it. We went to the jeweler together, and basically I tried on a whole brigade of rings. I’m very decisive so it was easy for me to outline what I did and didn’t like about each ring in detail. Fiance started picking up on it and was able to start predicting whether I would like a ring or not, which made me happy. We laid down some ground rules (i.e. I didn’t want a halo or a big “blingy” ring, prefer yellow/rose gold over white, love milgrain, etc.), he got a vision in his head, and custom designed a ring from that point (just because he is an over-achiever).

While we had the experience of ring shopping together, which I felt was very bonding for us haha, the ring was still completely up to his determination. Which is the way I wanted it, because then I knew I’d love it no matter what – otherwise, knowing me, I’d be miserable second-guessing it forever! Worked out great for our two personalities.

Hope that helps!

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