(Closed) For the childless, why?

posted 9 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Why did you or your partner decide not to have kids?

    I don't like kids

    Kids take too much energy

    Kids take too much time

    Kids are too expensive

    My or my partner's health doesn't permit it

    I wanted them, but never met the right person in time

    I wanted them, but wasn't able to conceive

    I wanted them, but I was worried about my/my partner's genetic history

    I wanted to do other activities (e.g. travel)

  • Post # 137
    Member
    189 posts
    Blushing bee

    View original reply
    @cbee: I love that those who choose to remain childfree are honest and have given it thought.  I think it is much better to go childfree if that is right for you, than to feel pressure to produce children, thereby doing it for the wrong reasons.

    Thank you!! This is all we ask. Understanding.

    The drive to have children is strong and stripped down, as humans, we are responding to a basic biological drive eat, sleep, breathe, have sex and procreate. But, there are some of us that do not have that drive to have children and exercised that option. People who do not want children do not feel as though they are missing out on anything. We have to be honest about this to the world, because we are constantly pressured to produce children. Although, not popular, *Not* having a child is the ultimate self-less act.

    Post # 138
    Member
    9816 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    Yeah I really don’t get when people say they don’t like children, but feel compelled to have one anyway. Save your kid the therapy bills.

    Also I find it odd when people say they “hate” children. I can understand the various reasons one might not want a child (they are sticky, loud, destructive, expensive, possibly germy) but you hate them? Really?

    Post # 139
    Member
    699 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    View original reply
    @Georgia Bee: Totally with you. We might have done it had we met sooner (and if I didn’t have health issues that would make it tricky to conceive and carry to term), but we are very happy with our lives now and would really have to rush things if we wanted to attempt the biological route. If we regret our decision in a few years, we’ll adopt.

    Post # 140
    Member
    952 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    We are definitely having kids whether we conceive or adopt. It’s very important to us and money is never a reason to not have something you want. I respect people who choose not to be parents. It’s the people who choose (or didn’t I suppose) and neglect or don’t properly look after their children. We have a problem in my area where people continue to have children even when they cannot look after the ones they already have and they end up in foster homes. That’s really sad. So to those who know they don’t want, I respect your decision and not having a child suffer!

    Post # 141
    Member
    427 posts
    Helper bee

    My goodness. That was a lot to read! It is such a touchy subject and I totally understand why. I have two children of my own, and Fiance has one. We don’t plan on having anymore but after we are married, who knows? Anyway, since I already have children, my comment is pretty irrelevant. However, I would like to say that I can personally appreciate and relate to most of what everyone has said. I have always wanted children and wanted to be a mother for as long as I can remember. But, I have friends and a sister that are more focused on being independent and having amazing jobs. I totally get that. Even though I am 100% NOT like that, everyone has a life passion whether it is to have children, or to have a traveling life with a dream job. No matter what we choose, we should just be happy to be able to do what we love even if others have negative things to say about it 🙂

    Post # 142
    Member
    1667 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Kids freak me out. . .that is all I’m adding to this incredibly long thread.

    Post # 143
    Member
    4369 posts
    Honey bee

    View original reply
    @SweetCheeks: Agree very much. I guess haters gonna hate! Personally, I’m too happy with my life to have time to think negatively about how others lead theirs.

    The topic ‘For the childless, why?’ is closed to new replies.

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