(Closed) For Those That Took a Little Longer to Get BFPs…

posted 7 years ago in Babies
  • poll: Was your BFP Tardy for the Party? How long were you tortured?
    BFP 5-7 months actively TTC : (15 votes)
    33 %
    BFP 8-10 months actively TTC : (13 votes)
    29 %
    BFP 11-13 months actively TTC : (9 votes)
    20 %
    BFP 14 months or longer actively TTC : (8 votes)
    18 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2538 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2009

    I know lots of ppl that have taken longer.  Some good friends are PG through IVF after 2 years.  Another couple has been trying for at least a year with 2 miscarriages.  Another friend has a 5 month-old after a year and a half trying (no interventions).  When I’ve asked people, I have heard tons of stories about it taking a good 8 months.

    I agree we need to hear more of the true stories about how long it can take!!

    Post # 4
    Member
    1145 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Great idea for a thread jholler!  

    Post # 5
    Member
    2792 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Where are all the votes for this thread?! Bumping for ya, JHoller!

    Post # 6
    Member
    4385 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Maybe I shouldn’t butt in, because we’re not even TTC yet, but I wanted to lend my support, jholler, and let you know that it took my sister 6 months to conceive, and she had all of the same thoughts as you! It’s normal to worry! Just hang in there, and I’m rooting for you!!

    Post # 7
    Member
    1285 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: February 2011

    I can’t vote cos we’re still TTC but we’re now heading in to cycle eight and quite frankly it sucks…

    I’m 29, he’s 31 and we have no obvious or known fertility issues and every new cycle we go into I start to worry just a little bit more…

    Good luck with your BFP!

    Post # 8
    Member
    152 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2009

    It took us 5 cycles to conceive the first time (ended in early miscarriage), and then we were lucky to conceive again on the 6th cycle (due Jan 21st).  I was charting, and using OPKs, and PreSeed, and making sure we were getting busy at all the right times!  So there was definitely a good amount of effort being put into the process – heh.

    It is rather difficult to maintain your sanity when TTC.  Especially when it seems like everyone around you conceived on the first try or without trying at all (two close friends of mine concieved on the first try, and two other friends conceived when trying to prevent).   It’s enough to make you wonder why you spent all that money on trying to prevent getting pregnant for so long – hah!

    I remember thinking…if I only KNEW for certain I would concieve sometime in the next year, I could relax and enjoy the process.  It was the not knowing that drove me insane.  Constantly questioning myself, wondering if there was something wrong, and worrying about “wasting time” (I was 36 when we started trying).   

    But you know what – you just have to keep reminding yourself that the stats are on your side (especially after getting normal results on all the testing you’ve had)!  I know that’s easier said than done, especially coming from someone that’s on the other side.  But I remember being in your exact same position not too long ago, and I remember how easy it was to let my mind think about all the (very unlikely) things that might be wrong with me/us!  Just tell that worrying mind of yours to shove it, and that you WILL conceive with or without it’s help thankyouverymuch!!

    Laughing

    And here’s a more heartwarming hopeful story – after 4 years of trying (using all sorts of fertility treatments) my cousin and his wife were able to conceive their beautiful daugther. And you want to know the best part?  It happened while they were on a caribbean vacation….taking a much needed break from all the fertlity treatments! 

    Good luck with your TTC journey – I hope it happens for you very soon!!

    Post # 9
    Member
    1660 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Hey jholler! It took my sister 5 or 6 months of very actively TTC (OPKs, charting) to get pregnant the first time. I think they started TTC in August and got pregnant in late Dec or early Jan. She unfortunately had a missed MC/D&C after 2 months. When she got her period back, they TTC for another 3 or 4 months and finally got pregnant again in July. I am hopeful that she now has her sticky baby – she’s almost 16 weeks!!!

    We have two cousins who initally took a long time to get pregnant the first time around…at least a year for both of them. I don’t know if they had any intervention (IUI, IVF), but now one of them has 3 beautiful children and the other one has 2.

    I am sure it is super frusterating/dissapointing, but try to hang in there! I saw your post about your hubby on the other thread and think he both sounds and looks (hello dimples!) adorable. Lean on one another and focus on all the blessings in your lives. I know that’s easier said than done sometimes!

    I’m having a really hard time waiting patiently for my Darling Husband to be ready to start trying…I want a baby desperately. However, I can put things in perspective quickly by thinking of my very good friend (bm in my wedding) who just got her 10th cancer diagnosis in 18 years. It doesn’t take away my sadness at not being a mom right now, but seeing what she’s going through does remind me that I’ve very lucky for my health and the high probability that I’ll get to be a mom at some point (on our own or via adoption). My poor friend may not get that chance – her eggs are frozen to protect them from all the chemo she’s had over the years, but she has to survive this latest bunch of tumors first. ๐Ÿ™ Anyway, I’m not talking about her to make you feel bad about how you’re feeling (esp. since I feel that way too and I’m not even TTC) – but I’m relaying this story because trying to keep things in perspective does seem to help my mood; that and remembering that my sister and cousins were all ultimately successful.

    Post # 11
    Member
    4038 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    We got pregnant at 10 months, but miscarried at 5-6 weeks. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    4038 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    @jholler25: Thank you. When I feel particularly bitter about it all, I remind myself that there are girls who have been trying longer and harder than me. It helps me keep things in perspective. And I remind myself that no matter how long it takes or what we need to do to get there, we’ll have a baby in our arms someday. It sucks hardcore now, but the alternative, to stop trying, isn’t an option. And I know that when I have my baby, it’s going to be so loved, and so incredibly wanted, and that someday, when they’re old enough to understand, I’ll tell them about how we struggled so long and hard, how we drove ourselves crazy and to tears month after month just to have them because we wanted them so very, very much. 

    Stay strong. I have no doubt you’ll get there soon, and you’re going to be such a great mother. This part sucks hard, but it’ll we’ll get there, and it will be so worth it.

    BIG HUGS!

    Post # 15
    Member
    9056 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2010

    Mostly commenting for ease of finding this for ease of reference in the future.  We’ll be on “cycle 3” this month.  “” since I haven’t had a period since I went off the pill in Aug, so it’s been three months of just doing it all the time and hoping we hit the possibly non-existent mark… Doctor said lack of period for 4 months, we’ll reassess, and no babies after 6 we’ll talk about other fertility treatments, since I was diagnosed with PCOS 4 years ago.

    Happy baby wishes your way though!

     

    Post # 16
    Member
    1660 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    @jholler25: this is totally unrelated, but your poll title reminded me of a video I have of my elderly grandmother “dancing” to that Tardy for the Party song. She was wheelchair bound due to crippling rehumatoid arthritis. It’s a good reminder (for me anyway) that attitude is everything! ๐Ÿ™‚  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CSg2cWkcAY (you might want to skip to 1:30, since she has the lights out for dramatic effect while she’s describing what she’s about to do).  hopefully the sight of an old lady trying to dance to that song doesn’t scar you for life! ๐Ÿ˜‰

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