Post # 1
My husband and I moved in together after the wedding. He was living in his own apartment and I was living in a house with 3 other girls, and now we are in family housing at the university. It’s not a palace but its affordable!
The problem is, he just has way more stuff than I do. I moved across the country 2 years ago, which just significantly cuts down on what you own. So I kinda feel like I’m living in a bachelor pad. We don’t have much money to go out and buy new things, and I feel a little silly being like “here, I bought a picture of a flower to go beside your picture of a moose.”
Anyone else have this problem? How do you make it more equally masculine/feminine without spending money on all new stuff?
Post # 3
Luckly for me we are in the exact opposite situation. I have been living on my own for the past 6 years and Fiance and lived mostly at home except for a short stint of living in an apt. with friends. Over time I have been setting up my house like a home so he will just move his personal belongs over shortly before we get married. Have you talked to him about this? Would he be offended if you swaped out some of his stuff? You could find some great deals at yard sales or thrift stores for not much. Do you have an IKEA near you? They have some nice stuff that you could use as accents and they are pretty inexpensive.
Post # 4
When I moved in with my hubby, he already owned his place. So pretty much everything was his. Luckily he was very understanding and said I could do what I want with the place, hang up what I want and take down what I want. Decor just isn’t important to him. As time went on, we’d buy some new stuff (pictures from goodwill, frames to put pics of us in, etc, nothing expensive) or I would paint stuff for our home. Right now, it’s bachelor pad furniture with girly pictures up. Not ideal, but I know when we get a different house we’ll be able to change more things.
Post # 5
My fiance just bought a house and while he does have a lot of stuff, we decorated it together and bought some new furniture. I’m not moving in until January but I don’t have much to bring besides my clothes and some little items. I’m sure he will let you paint and add little things to the house if you’d like to!
Post # 6
I think you should just work on streamlining his stuff. Like, compromise and take down the most offending items ;-). At least it will pare down the bachelor pad feel, and when you move to another place/have more money, you can add in a little more of your own style. Another option would be to shop antique stores/yard sales, etc and refinish some furniture yourself to add in your own personal flair. I have a couple of pieces that I redid that are more ornate but now refinished in a bright, modern color. It adds a lot of interest to what was otherwise an apartment overrun with IKEA staples.
Post # 7
That’s our situation too. I moved back to the States and into his place – he’s been here 3 years now!
We’re hoping to move (i.e. upgrade) once I get a job, but until then? We’re here!
It was really hard at first; after a few weeks, I sat down and talked to him about it though, how I didn’t feel at home, etc. and he has been really great about encouraging me to settle and make it my own space since then. When we’re out, if I see little stuff that I like, he is quick to be like, “Oh! let’s get it!”
I think communicating with him about it helped a lot, because he’s been so understanding and intentional.