- 8 years ago
I know most of the bees on this board are pretty darn sure they are getting engaged. Either the ring has been found, the timeline agreed upon, or the SO has said “yes, I want to marry you someday or in the year 20____? Or maybe a little bit of all of these.
Then, there are those bees, like myself, whose SO is “reluctant.” We know they love us, and we know that they are faithful, we know we want to marry them, but for whatever reason they aren’t “ready.” I’m in this boat and often I feel a little out of place on the boards, but there are others like me in this situation.
I have to tell you that something happened today. A young girl I work with has only been here about a month or so. I barely know her. She came to me and told me about her situation. In short, she was in the same situation as some of us bees who are REALLY REALLY waiting (no promise, no ring purchased, etc). They dated 3 1/2 years and he kept making excuses and freaking out…he even left her. Two days later, he came crying back but she put on her big girl pants and said “no way” ! “I’m tired of this guessing and wondering.”
He moved out of town. She was devastated – she said it’s been the worse 6 months of her life. She dreams about him all the time. And she said he’s always the first person she thinks of every morning. She dreams about him.
A miracle happened. She was in a wedding last week and he was in the same wedding. They saw each other (haven’t spoken in 6 months) and he cried. Told her he had been miserable without her. That night they sat on the beach and he pulled a huge stack of papers out of his pocket where he had written down all the lessons learned while they had been apart, he even apologized for things he had said and done and his reluctance. They are now back together.
She told me something and I think God put her in front of me today. I don’t know this girl very well, and she was sharing intimate details with me. I told her a little about my situation. She said “don’t walk away – give it time.” She told me it was the worst 6 mmonths of her life. Then, while I was away at a meeting she left me a quote on a piece of paper by an “unknown” author. Here is what it said:
“It’s hard to wait around for something you know may never happen; but it is even harder to give up when you know it’s everything you want.”
Just struck a cord. And I know all situations are different. But I thought I’d throw it out there for a discussion.
Or comments, whatever.