(Closed) Forgot to put stamps on the return envelope!!

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
81 posts
Worker bee

I feel like that would be overkill. Don’t worry though, a stamp is cheap. 

Post # 3
3164 posts
Sugar bee

I would send the note and postage stamp to people i think will expect it – in our families it would be our older aunties and uncles for example. For everyone else I would leave it. 

Post # 4
1633 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

View original reply
Beegritte:  This seems like a good middle ground. When I read OP’s post, I wavered between thinking it overkill and thinking it would be a thoughtful gesture (knowing that I would also be a little embarrassed if I made this mistake, though I’m sure most guests wouldn’t ultimately care).

OP, how many invitations did you send? Because sending out this little explanation card to everyone could amount to something like an additional $30-50 if you’ve invited a lot of guests! And I think if I received a wedding invitation with no stamp on the RSVP, I probably wouldn’t think much about it, even though I know the host is supposed to include one.

I like the idea of just sending the additional cards with stamps out to guests you know will notice the error. With everyone else you can leave it be, and if it were me I’d probably text a couple of my invited girlfriends, “I’m an idiot, forgot the stamp,” and have a laugh about it.

Post # 5
158 posts
Blushing bee

I’d sent them! Definately! To everyone. Overkill is better than thoughtless.

Post # 6
9080 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: Dorset, UK

View original reply
lndsyknpp:  Don’t worry about it, I always buy a nice card and my own stamp to RSVP and I really don’t mind.

Post # 7
531 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

It wouldn’t bother me not having a stamp provided but I rarely rsvp by post. I agree with sending to those who expect it is a nice gesture. 

Post # 8
4037 posts
Honey bee

It’s overkill. And what you said is right, most people don’t return them, anyway.

Most of the weddings I’ve been invited to, in the last few years, have asked for online responses. My daughter did – through their wedding website. 248 of 250 invited guests responded, by 10 days before their due date, including her then 87 year old grandmother, who’s on the internet every day. No waste – big win!

Post # 10
2134 posts
Buzzing bee

Do not send a note. I would laugh to be honest if you send a note apologizing for leaving out the stamp. 

It wouldn’t even phase me.

Post # 13
3913 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

View original reply
lndsyknpp:  I wouldn’t worry about it. I’m not sure I’d even think about it if I received an RSVP envelope with no stamp. 

Post # 14
1740 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

It may be overkill, but I would probably do it anyway, if only because it *may* help increase your RSVP response rate.  I know that I never have stamps on hand because I only mail something like 3 letters a year — I send more packages than that, but those require a trip to the post office, not just stamps…and I usually send them late because getting to the Post Office is a PITA.  If you sent me the stamp, it’s distinctly possible that I would return the RSVP much more quickly (although if you have an online RSVP, I’d be more likely to go that route regardless).  

I did remember to put stamps on my RSVP postcards, and yet I’ve received fewer than half back at this point.  And they are postcards — literally, all the respondents have to do is check a box (“Happily Accepts” or “Regretfully Declines”) and drop it back in the mail — and yet most have not, although the cut off date is May 29, so they still have plenty of time. 

If I were you, I would do everything possible to encourage the quick return of the RSVPs, even if it may be perceived as overkill to some people.  The worst thing that would happen is people would laugh at your note, and that’s not such a bad thing.  At least it will make your invitation memorable!  

Post # 15
1347 posts
Bumble bee

Don’t worry about it. It’s not a big deal. People who are too lazy to get their own stamp are probably too lazy to rsvp in the first place. 

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