Post # 1
So just a little question really:
What matters to you most when it comes to the wedding? Form or function?
Do you think it’s more important to think about the costs of the (boring) stuff so your day can function or would you rather spend the money on form and have all the pretty details?
Your wedding dress is beautiful but you couldn’t possibly use the toilet wearing it…do you ditch it and look for something easier to wear?
You can spend your last $500 on fairy lights, everywhere! Or you could save it to make sure your car has enough gas to get you to the airport and back…?
Experience may win here, as I am guessing most Brides2B will think petty and most married ladies looking back will have a difference set of agendas in retrospect.
Post # 4
Function. You can’t enjoy the pretty details if you’re miserable or trying to deal with a logistical catastrophe.
Post # 5
- Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast
I don’t think they are mutually exclusive concepts, to be quite honest. We looked for both. Our venue had to be very handicap accessible AND stunningly beautiful. My dress had to make me feel like a queen AND be comfortable to hang out in for 12+ hours.
Post # 6
Always function over form (was that way before the wedding too). But I’m an engineer, so there’s that.
Post # 7
Believe it or not, one can have both. Our guests will be comfortable and well-fed, and we will also have plenty of pretty details. I don’t see how this is an either/or sort of thing.
Post # 8
@lovekiss: I know most people will look at both in the end as you can never really be one or the other ALL the time. I think it was more about what came first, or if there was a choice to be made, which way are you likely to swing.
Post # 9
Please can people stop taking thing so seriously all the time?
Post # 10
I think most brides begin with our visions for the lofty, beautiful dream. However, if, or when, the advantages of the pretty begin to pale in comparison to the realities of the logistics, we have to abandon some ideas in favor of more practical solutions.
Just as an example, I was married outside on a beautiful terrace in front of a fountain and a stunning pergola. Still, I wanted an aisle runner. Unfortunately, I had to scrap that idea as soon as I realized that there would be no good way for the floral-events person to affix a runner to the concrete, and with the wind outside, I couldn’t risk having it be untethered. Faced with the potential logistics of a billowing aisle runner on which I or others could trip (or one that was unattractively affixed to the pavement), I abandoned that idea in favor of an aisle lined with rose petals.
Post # 11
Function over form, but you should always strive for both. It’s like throwing a good bowl or vase, you want it to serve it’s purpose, but you also want it to be pleasing to the eye.
Post # 12
Of course they are not mutually exclusive, but it’s pretty obvious that you need to have the functional details locked down in order to be able to enjoy the pretty ones. Nobody (well, almost nobody) aims for a wedding that’s just functional and not beautiful – but everyone should aim for a wedding that’s functional as well as beautiful, right? Not sure why you’re unhappy that people are “taking things so seriously” …? You asked a question on an internet forum and you’re getting answers. Were you really expecting a bunch of people to chime in, “oh, form! Shiny things! Only pretty matters, who cares about guests’ comfort?”
Post # 13
Maybe I was looking for a little light heartedness, or was that not evident in the ‘toilet in the bushes’ remark? Hmm must strive to be more clear and only attempt light hearted humour when away from the internet.
Either way let’s hope we all manage to balance the need for both form and function but maybe give in to our inner Pinterest demon by searching every thrift store to get 200 mason jars as glasses even if they are a nightmare to drink from!
Post # 14
Hmmm…I probably would have said form before I joined the bee, but now I say function. The aesthetics are still really important to me, but after reading posts on the bee where brides ask if it’s mean to kick BMs out of the wedding party for being pregnant, or expect people to make a 3 hour plane journey to a wedding where they won’t have a seat, or think it’s okay to make people wait around for hours to go to the reception while they get photos taken, I’ve changed my mind.
I realise that getting engaged is no excuse to turn into a selfish asshole who is totally blind to eveything but their own needs, and making sure my guests are comfortable and having a good time is a big part of the day. People won’t have fun if things aren’t running smoothly, and I can’t decide on how to decorate the church if I never booked it because I needed the deposit for my £1000 bridal shoes. I don’t think form really matters if there’s no function.
Post # 15
I am having an outdoor wedding. In the beginning I was so excited to not have a venue that I needed to worry about pleasing in terms of min/max numbers and timelines…but when logistics entered the picture I quickly became less excited.
Peeing in the bushes was actually a decision I had to confront, we will be too far away from the house (with 2 bathrooms) to make people walk to it – we will have 200 +/- guests … and people have to deal with nature when it calls…
I had to get porta johns. I was mortified. Noone wants to have their beautiful ceremony/reception pics to havea porta john in the background. And the fact that we’re asking guests to use them in the first place? I have friends and family who won’t use the bathroom in a restaurant if they don’t have to. 🙁 And the girls? stepping out of a portajohn and fixing their dress? Or what about WASHING HANDS?! I fought with the idea of going to a venue and not having to think about it at all…(except there isn’t one near us that fits our capacity).
I talked my mom and we figured out that we could put two-four in a small tent, one for men one for women. I could have a table with a mirror and a basket of antibacterial gels, lotion etc… and then when a girl gets out she doesn’t have to worry about flashing 200 other guests while she fixes her skirt. The situation is not ideal, but its better then making them trek to the house or ‘pee in the bushes’. lol
We had a logistics issue that I *wanted* to solve in a way that satisfied both form and function. I could’ve stopped at just providing the johns themselves – but I worked extra hard to come up with a way for it still to have some shred of class as well. I put extra emphasis on that because I chose to…long story short, sometimes you can solve one and figure nout how to work in the other if you feel it is important to you.
Post # 16
Function. I get slightly annoyed by pretty but useless things. However, there is one exception when it comes to this business of weddings. Letterpress. OMG nothing is more useless (and wasteful) but damnit it’s so gorg! If budget wasn’t an issue thats one area where I would have no problem spending without a blink of an eye.