(Closed) Found Hidden (Family) Rings…Anxiously Waiting.

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: did you ever find hidden family rings and, if so, how long after did he propose?
    i found them and he proposed after 1 month : (2 votes)
    22 %
    i found them and he proposed after 6 months : (1 votes)
    11 %
    i found them and he proposed after 1 year + : (1 votes)
    11 %
    i found them and he still hasn't proposed! : (5 votes)
    56 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    110 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I would say they are there for safe keeping – why suspect they are for you if they have always been there and never been moved since you moved in. Just leave them be and ignore them – probably just family heirlooms – what else would he do with them??

    My best advice is to wait for it to happen when it happens. I ruined my engagement by ‘waiting’ like alot of bees do. I love my husband more than anything, but my pressurising, worrying and waiting (i tried sooo hard not too) caused many emotional arguments.

    Post # 5
    Member
    110 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Its the hardest thing in the world the waiting, and then the engagement… and then you marry and its AMAZING… and then you spend so long waiting for things you honestly have no idea what to do with yourself!!

    Enjoy your time as a couple πŸ™‚

    Post # 7
    Member
    162 posts
    Blushing bee

    My SO actually has a WEDDING DRESS which belonged to his grandmother… having wedding-related family heirlooms doesn’t mean he’s planning to get married.

    The rings aren’t exactly hidden – they’re in your SO’s bedside drawer and have been there since before you moved in. I’d guess that he inherited them and just put them away for safe keeping. I think it’s wishful thinking to say he left them there for you to find (because they’ve been there for ages) or to prepare you for a proposal (the rings wouldn’t be there if he was planning on using them to propose).

    If he was going to propose he’d take the rings away and hide them from you, and maybe have them cleaned and re-set. The fact that they’re just lying there is (in my opinion) a pretty strong indicator that he’s not planning to propose with one of those rings any time soon. Maybe with another ring, but not those ones. Although he said you’re “so far from getting married”… sorry but I wouldn’t expect a proposal if my SO said that.

     

    Post # 9
    Member
    169 posts
    Blushing bee

    @blondeambition7:  Yes, I’m sorry to say it, but if he’s directly told you that he’s “so far from getting married” – it sounds like you two have very different timelines. How old are you, and how old is he? I’ve heard that men often aren’t ready for marriage until a few years after they’ve graduated school and had a steady job. So, if they’ve gone to college, this article said they likely wouldn’t be ready to wed until age 26… and if they went to grad school, then even later! So, the age/school/job situation might give us some hints to offer better advice. Regardless, though, it sounds like he’s being pretty clear that marriage is not in the cards within the next few years, and you need to decide if that’s a timeline you’re willing to accomodate πŸ™

    Post # 10
    Member
    3471 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

    I’d guess that he forgot they wree there, they were probably given to him by his grandma who passed, for “someday” when he finds the right girl or whatever– but he forgot they were in the drawer, or as he said– his mind is too far away from marriage for that to occur to him right now. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    911 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I agree with most PP’s. Go by what he told you, the rings are probably still there because he didn’t give them another thought.

    Just some advice, he said he hoped that moving with you would help you to “chill out” on the marriage issue. I know you are only posting on here (totally acceptable :)) but I wouldn’t advise you to talk to him about the rings as some of your friends have said. From everything that he has told you, it probably won’t happen for awhile.

    BUT, you do know him better than we do and who knows I could be completely wrong and he could propose tomorrow. I just don’t see the signs pointing the way you want them to right now.

    Post # 15
    Member
    299 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Honey, he already admitted that he moved in with you so you’d chill out on the marriage thing.  You already got a “shut up” apartment, do you really want a “shut up” ring, too? I’ve gotten one before, they totally suck.

    If it’s driving you crazy just open your nightstand one night and say “hey, did you know these were in my nightstand?”  Actual communication can go a long way.

    Post # 16
    Member
    705 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 1993

    I think you need to stop ‘finding’ these rings (snoop much? πŸ˜‰ ) and take this man at his word. He’s not ready.  He’ll let you know when he is, with a proposal.  

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