(Closed) Found out 2 very good friends are pregnant….and I'm still not

posted 5 years ago in TTC
Post # 2
Member
826 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I definitely understand. I just found out today that one of my cousins is pregnant with their second “oops” baby. I’m totally baffled. I just want to pull her aside and be like “how does that even happen?!” We’ve been trying for 6 months, and it gets harder each month. Hang in there!

Post # 3
Member
6025 posts
Bee Keeper

MsYankee:  Just wanted to send you some internet hugs. I can understand needing to vent. And that sinking feeling when it seems like everyone around you is getting pregnant and you’re still trying.

Darling Husband and I tried for a really, really long time before we were able to get pregnant. In the time that we were trying (although we hadn’t ever told anyone that we were trying), several of our close friends got pregnant. A couple of them even got pregnant TWICE in the time we were trying. My Brother-In-Law and (now ex) SIL also had two kids during the time Darling Husband and I were trying. That was the worst, because she is competitive in a not-so-nice way, and she really made me feel even worse about it. It was hard being happy for all of these other people when I felt sad. It wasn’t that I wasn’t happy for them — I was! But I still felt sad and felt like I had to hide that. Plus, it was super hard having everyone ask us, “So when are you guys going to start trying for kids?”

Anyhow, I guess I’m just trying to say I understand how you feel and to send you some internet support. Trying and waiting is so hard, but, once it happens, it will be fabulous and just perfect. *hugs*

Post # 5
Member
625 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Hugs!! My SIL is 5 months pregnant and my other SIL has the single most charming two year old little boy I’ve ever met. Being around them makes my ovaries weep. Try to stay positive throughout this and keep on trying!!

Post # 6
Member
439 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Two c my friends have gotten pregnant since we’ve been trying as well. It sucks. I thought we’d be pregnat together. The worst was shopping for a baby shower gift for one of them on the same day I got my period. I just wanted to cry in the store. The other friend is having her shower at the end of the month…hoping I have my BFP by then!

Post # 8
Member
1639 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I totally get out how you feel. A lot of ladies around here have seen my venting. Many friends and family members got pregnant this last year, either as an oops or on their first try. It’s an interesting mix of emotions: happiness, excitement, and a bit of disappointment.

It’s okay though, we’ll get to join them soon!

Post # 9
Member
621 posts
Busy bee

MsYankee:  Don’t feel bad for feeling this way!! It’s just natural to be jealous and sad – I don’t think there’s anyone on this board that’s been trying for a while that hasn’t gone through it! There’s always that element of “happy for them, sad for me” when someone gets pregnant and you’re trying. I hope your turn comes very soon! Just let yourself feel sad without any guilt about it, and the happiness/joy for the others will come. Sending you hugs and good wishes. 

Post # 10
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

Hugs!!!

Post # 11
Member
4998 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Oh man, that is tough! I think anyone in that position would feel some jealousy and resentment, so that is totally understandable. We have been trying for about 5 months, but I’m not even ovulating so we have a long road ahead. Thankfully for me, most of my close friends aren’t even married so I don’t have to worry about them announcing any time soon. 

Post # 12
Member
549 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

MsYankee:  i totally feel your pain!! none of my good friends are pregnant (2 best friends not even married) but my my SIL’s son just turned 1 and i know she’ll be trying again soon. we are very close in age and got married within months of each other, and although we love each other i feel there is always the “comparison” game going on (or maybe it’s in my own head?) anyway, i adore my nephew but lately, when i see him, i get sad because he is already over a year and we still don’t have our first, so it just reminds me of that. we didnt start trying at the same time as my brother and his wife (they got pregnant right after their wedding and we purposely waited over a year to start trying) but she still got pregnant on her first or second shot and here i am, 5-6 months in…. no bfp yet. if she announces her second pregnancy before i’m even pregnant with my first i know it will be very difficult at all of our various family functions and events.

i really hope this is your month. on the bright side, you will have good friends with little ones around the same time you’ll likely have your own, so there is that to look forward to 🙂 

Post # 13
Member
2902 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Aww, I totally get that feeling of “happy for you, but sad for me.” I hope this is your month!

Post # 14
Member
3295 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - An amazing non-profit retreat

I hope this is your month! I know how you feel. I can’t seem to connect to my SIL’s pregnancy… I am just jealous and sad that in the span of three years, they met, married and got pregnant where for me, it’s wait, wait, wait some more. Before it was waiting to get married, then waiting to sell our home and buy a new home, and now it’s waiting for mother nature to kick in. Most days I am okay, but last night I was drunk and he told me that she called to say she’s having a boy, and she’s decorating the room, and all I could think about was the completely empty room beside our bedroom which is meant to be a nursery.

The topic ‘Found out 2 very good friends are pregnant….and I'm still not’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors