- 8 years ago
Hello there everyone….
I am so glad to be a part of this board. It’s been a few weeks that I have looked through and read almost every post here. It has helped me cope with my situation a lot.
Now here’s to my situation. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years, 1 month, and 11 days (haha). We have lived together for 2 years. So earlier this year I got the wedding bug. I realized that time was ticking and we have been together long enough to know whether or not we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. I want us to start our family together.
So Jan 2010 I brought it up to him. Just in a polite and kind way. He took to it well. He responded as I wanted him to and stated that his intentions on marriage were the same as mine. So fast forward to two months ago.
July 2010 we went ring shopping. I found a ring and it was gorgeous. Kind of expensive though. It was about his three months pay. I was extremely excited after that. I started semi planning (He doesn’t know about any of this). I looked up venues, thought of colors, printed out dresses, you name it. I even got a small budget together and a preliminary guest list (for my family at least). I have a small binder made up of some ideas for the wedding. (Which will DEFINITELY be a Destination Wedding by the way).
So a month after being obsessed and finding the ring I thought about the “budget”. I make more money than him and he is not the “saver”. So I set out, alone, to find a more reasonably priced ring. And boy did I ever. I found one that was about his one month’s pay and it is just as gorgeous if not more than the first one. And about a quarter of the price. So I emailed it to him. He said that he liked it. So this past weekend he and I went to look at it. (He didn’t purchase it).
I think I have went through “The Waiting Cycle” about twice now since the year started and I’m back to beginning it for the third time. I hate to wait and I’m ready to marry the man I’m in love with. So here’s the issues….
So tenatively I want to have a June wedding, a summer wedding period. We live in Texas and I want to marry in Florida which we both agree because we love the beach so much. It’s already September and because it will be a destination wedding I fear I won’t have enough time to plan and prepare by June. Waiting another year is out of the question. The location and date are perfect due to many, many, reasons.
Another thing is that he doesn’t make as much money as I do. I offered to start the layaway on the ring (which was only 10% down) but he refused. Which I can understand. As I stated he is not the best saver or person who manages money well. So I’m afraid it will take him forever to save and purchase the ring.
I told him I didn’t want to go into 2011 un-engaged and he said “he knows”. My bday is next month, then we have Christmas, and New Year’s. But waiting until the end of the year to propose would mean a strain on guest who want to attend the wedding. They won’t have a lot of time to prepare. Please help!
Can anyone help me? I’m going crazy.