(Closed) Found this chat between my husband and another woman. Is this cheating? (Long)

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 107
2402 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Yikes – Didn’t thing the convo was bad until I got to the “we’d be getting naked right now” part. You are not over-reacting at ALL, and yes I would consider this emotional cheating.

I’m sorry 🙁

Post # 109
620 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry about what you are going through. It really didn’t look like he had any intention of following through with what he was talking about especially since you checked his phone bill and didn’t find a call to her number. I also don’t think that he cares about her at all I think he was just flirting to get her to give him an ego boost but I do think it was very unacceptable and you have every right to be mad.

Post # 110
1723 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I do consider this cheating as well, Im really sorry your going through this– I guess you just have to sit and talk to him aout it, and if it continues againn then just take matters in your own  hands. Im sure if it was thhe other way around, he would be incredibly upset– He should definelty delete her- but I tink that your trust is semi broken now and thats something he has to try to work on to help you trust him again.

Post # 111
383 posts
Helper bee

I’m glad you’re able to work it out.  Keep your eyes open……. 


Best of luck – I hope this blows over and you never have to deal with it again.  It’s very humiliating.

Post # 112
97 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

i think he was being NICe.. then she pushed him.. he tried to back away, and he flirted a little bit.. men are men.. and cant help but say what they REALLY think sometimes…

this girl is obviously insecure and was digging for some sort of compliment from your man..

i think he cut her off in a polite way.. there are lions out there and its ok if men react the wrong way but correct themselves.. if he knows you can read his stuff then i’d bring it up to him.. if he doesn’t know.. you could do more damage by saying you found it.. he would think you dont trust him!!!

Post # 113
2114 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I would be pissed , it is entirely inappropriate/emotional cheating to me. I think you are making excuses for him (maybe its a midlife crisis, maybe too much to drink , he doesn’t think its cheating if its not physical) – you were very quick to call her names and not your husband..but the only one that owes you anything and made a commitment to you is HIM.. and he is definitely the one that took that conversation to the next level more than once. I am glad you are able to work through this but please don’t make excuses for him and see it for what it really is.

Post # 114
269 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@chrispygal: I totally agree. I wouldn’t call it cheating per say, but you are right to be hurt. It is TOTALLY inappropriate. I think you should try to outline why it’s inappropriate and how much it has effected you to him.

Post # 116
4640 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

i admire your strength and clear headedness through this all.

however, i wonder, how are you going to trust him now and are you going to make sure you don’t look through his fb again or emails? will you always be suspecting and wondering? that’s the part that would keep eating at me. i hope you find a way to regain that trust in him that he has violated.

Post # 118
3165 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@LuckyLuna: good for you, girl. sounds like you’ve got your head on straight, i’m sincerely happy that you two worked things out and hope he honors your trust!

Post # 119
89 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I am so sorry you had to go through that. But I wish you the best trying to work this out. 

Post # 121
7288 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

@LuckyLuna:  I’m glad to hear that things are moving forward, as you feel that this is forgivable. Keep us updated, and talk whenever you need !

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