(Closed) French Kissing Your Hubby

posted 4 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
1082 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

It would be frustrating if you really enjoy it.

DH and I don’t french kiss very often, but neither of us minds.

Post # 4
302 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Oh how sad. Sorry you aren’t getting that passioante moment in your marriage often. I sincerely find it a necessary part of our relationship. When you date you care for how you look, you are kind to eachother, men are chivalrous and women are thoughtful, and we french kiss to show our passion. I don’t think any of those things should go by the wayside because you are married. I grant that once married, one f the perks is becoming comfortablde with each other, and loving each other unconditionally. However, I think that making an effort to retain passion etc in a marriage is super important.

I don’t think you are being unreasonable at all. I think you have done the right thing in addressing it with your spouse. Work on letting him know how important it is for you to express your passion and feel passion in return. If you let him know how important this is, I don’t think it will be something that will happpen every day, but I imagine he will make an effort to incorporate it more often. He loves you after all, and wants you to be happy. He married you after all!

Good luck! 🙂

Post # 5
2334 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@alaskin17:  oh that must be frustrating for u 🙁 has he given a reason why? We french kiss quite a bit, at the beach, in the kitchen but doesn’t last hrs more like 30 seconds lol. We both like it though if one of us didn’t we probably wouldn’t as much. id talk to your man about it. Good luck 

Post # 6
953 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@alaskin17:  UGH!! <— That was for you, btw. I am seriously frustrated for you.

My ex was the same way but that was just the tip of his intimacy problems. Still, it used to frustrate me that he would only give me little pecks unless it was the middle of the night, in the dark and he wanted sex. Even then he seemed almost “asleep” or not really there mentally. He was a head case for sure. 

Of course when we first started dating he was all about french kissing me, and it made me really depressed when it stopped. I know it was about him, not me, but I still tried everything I could to be more kissable until one day I realized how deep his issues were and that I am not qualified to handle them nor do I deserve to suffer for them when he wouldn’t seek help.

I’ve been with my FI for 3.5 years now and the passion has not let up. It ebbs and flows, but we still make out like teenagers once every few months or so. 

I’m not sure what to advise you but I just wanted to say I know how it feels and it’s not you, it’s him.

Post # 7
416 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I love kissing too.  Sometimes we’ll be sitting on the couch, and I’ll be like “wanna make out?” and whether he’s in the mood or not, he’ll usually appease me for a minute.  I don’t have advice for you, sadly, because we’ve always been a kissy couple.  But maybe explaining it’s important to you?  The other thing is DH used to think every time we frenched it would lead to sex, so if he wasn’t in the mood for that, he didn’t let the kissing get too far.  When I explained that sometimes I just like kissing and it can stop there, he became a lot more open to mini-make-out sessions.  Good luck!

Post # 8
825 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@alaskin17:  ugh, that really sucks that he won’t do it, especially if you’ve told him how much you like it :/ FI and I have been together two years and we still french kiss or make out multiple times a week, if not every day! 

Post # 9
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I don’t think you’re being unreasonable at all.  I love french kissing too, and I have a hard time when my husband doesn’t want to as often as I would like.  I’m interested in hearing the responses.  I’ve tried talking to him about it, but he hasn’t budged.

Post # 10
9256 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

We don’t all that often either, except for something during “whoopie” (haven’t heard that in a while).  Usually we just do little pecks.  But you’re right, it’s super sexy.

I would just tell him very gently how much it means to you, and how much you would like it if he would go with it more often, and point out how you do things that he likes (blow jobs anyone?!?  Obviously this will only work if you actually do things he likes….)  Don’t make him feel pressured or guilty though.  The way you said “I just couldn’t stand it anymore” makes me think you maybe put him on the defensive?  That won’t work.  Good luck!

(Oh and I answered this even though we’re not married cause we’ve been together for over 10 years – took the scenic route to marriage – so I feel like I’m qualified Smile)

Post # 11
405 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Wow, that sucks. My FI and I try to have a “real kiss” at least daily, and at minimum usually at least have a few pecks. 

You are not being unreasonable, but I don’t know how you can convince him that french kisses are awesome. 

Post # 12
1963 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I am the one that is not crazy about french kissing in our relationship, but it is important to DH that we do that while we DTD so we always do. And I have grown to enjoy it much more. Perhaps if he was willing to just go for it it could be the same way for him?

Post # 13
96 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

This really sucks! I love kissing especially during “whoopie” lol SO and I dont make out as much as we used to but i think we both make a conscious effort to do more often. I think your right, it shows passion and i also think it keeps the relationship feeling young and new. I hope he can understand where your coming from because im sure you do things for him that you dont necessarily enjoy all the time (know what I’m saying lol) 

Post # 14
645 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I’m not really into kissing in general, but when we still ‘french’ when we are feeling particularly passionate. I think maybe about once a week? Ish? And the rest of the time, just pecks usually. Sorry your DH isn’t into it… 🙁 I agree with PP who suggested explaining that it doesn’t always have to lead to sex? I find FI seems to think this way too, so maybe that’s part of the problem.

Post # 15
692 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

My DH and I love to french 😀 Maybe not every day, but more than once I week, I think.  Making out is a fun way to get the other one in the mood!


That’s unfortunate that your DH doesn’t like to french.  I think its like any intimate thing; maybe its not his favorite, but you really like it, so as long as he doesn’t hate it/it makes him uncomfortable, maybe he could try to add it in more for your sake.  Though I don’t know a good way for you to communicate that with him.

Post # 16
3596 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2000

@alaskin17:  I’ll send you my dog. He loves to french kiss. I just want closed mouth kisses from him but he slips that tongue in there! and it’s a shock. He’s such a nut.

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