Post # 1
So I have just started looking at planning after getting engaged over Christmas. I really like the idea of February 14th, 2014. My fiancé and I were best friends before becoming a couple, so we never really had a first date anniversary. It just kind of happened around February, so we have been using V Day as our unofficial anniversary for the last 6 years. I think it would be awesome to get married on our “anniversary”.
However, this date falls on a Friday. Obviously not a big deal for us or for really close family and friends who I know can all take a day off work/school whatever. But what about out of town guests traveling (though we do not have many – 90% of our guest list lives in the same city or within a couple hours drive). The venue I have my eye on does a set schedule – ceremony at 4:30, cocktails at 5 and dinner at 6. I think if it’s really tight for people to get off work, they could just skip the ceremony and come for the reception. Also, it’s a Friday before a Monday holiday in Alberta, so usually people make it an extra long weekend.
How common are Friday ceremony/receptions? For those of you that have done it, did you receive less RSVPs than you think you would have for a Saturday?
Post # 3
My daughter is getting married Friday June 1st, 2012. Everyone thought we were strange when I told them it was a Friday. She felt that way it gives the ones who want to take the day off for the wedding a long weekend. The wedding is at 11:00am, so people can still enjoy there Friday night as well. We know that the important people will be there, and if the rest make it that will be great otherwise we will still have a great day!!
Post # 4
Unfortunately, I had to miss one of my best friend’s weddings because she had it on a Friday. I don’t really subscribe to the whole “the people who want to be there will be there” theory. Sometimes, it’s just not possible no matter how much people love you. I felt awful that I missed her wedding, but not all jobs are that flexible to be able to take off in the middle of the day Friday to attend a wedding.
I think even asking people to arrive for the reception at 6 is a lot to ask for a weekday, even if they skip the ceremony. They would still need to leave work early, go home and change, drive to the venue in Friday rush hour traffic, etc. That, and the fact that you are asking people to give up their own Valentine’s Day plans is asking a lot of your guests, in my opinion. I wouldn’t do a Friday afternoon wedding, because it would mean a lot to me to have the people I love there, but as long as you are understanding that not all people can/will make it, then go for it!
Post # 5
I had a Friday wedding. We had a small ceremony with 40 guests, and then 60 more were invited to the reception. We didn’t have very any oot guests, and all the locals were able to come. I thought it was great because then people had the rest of the weekend to themselves.
Post # 6
Thanks for the opinions. My fiancé agreed to the date because it is special for us, and since we are planning this two years in advance, people will have lots and lots of time to arrange their schedules. The majority of our friends all work in the same industry (we are both engineers) and all of our companies offer plenty of flex/vacation/personal days.
As for other people skipping their V Day plans, nobody I know really puts that much emphasis on the day itself. But even if they did, what’s more romantic that going to a wedding on Valentine’s day?
I don’t want to sound selfish, but I think two years is more than enough time for people to make plans. I’m very excited to have the date set!!
Post # 7
@Pinkmoon: I’m with you. I think it would be very romantic for us to attend a wedding on Valentine’s Day. We are among those people who are able to get a day off when we need it, but not everyone is in the same position.
Those in unionized jobs bid on vacation by seniority and that is not usually done until November or December of 2013 in your case. Others may be employed in jobs where they don’t let any staff have days off on holidays.
As you state you have already set the date, it doesn’t really seem you are looking for input about that. Just remember it’s not personal when some of the people you invite have to decline because they can’t get the time off.
Post # 8
I think Friday weddings need to be more aware of their guest lists, but it can be really lovely. We’re getting married on a Friday evening, and while I wasn’t into it at first, I’m really enjoying how the plan is working out. (Our venue wasn’t available on Saturday and we were limited on weekends)
I went into inviting people knowing that many of the out of town guests may not be able to miss a day of work to come. Every single time I get a yes RSVP I feel so grateful and honored, its really worth it. Also, it means that the Out of Town guests get to have a nice weekend trip to a really neat city, without having to spend Saturday in formal clothes. We’re organizing some touristy stuff that people can either come with us or not for the afternoon. (lunch at a cute diner, a trip to an iconic museum, a visit to a special historical tavern, dinner at our favorite downtown resturant) We’re not hosting the Saturday things, but more casually inviting our friends to come hang out with us and do fun things. It means that we get to spend Saturday with our friends and family in a more low key seting as well.
We have been very lucky in that most people who had to take off work were able to – we told them the date back in December so they got their requests for time off into their workplaces early. Some local people are just taking the afternoon or a couple of hours at the end of the day off.
If you know that most of your guest list can handle it, and are respectful about the ones who might not be able to, Friday weddings can allow you to spend more time with your guests and save money.
Post # 9
Agree with TheLadyK. Realize that some just won’t be able to come. Those who do can get an extra day with the newlyweds or on their own in a different city. We’re having a 6pm wedding on a Friday evening. I couldn’t pass up the cost difference for a Friday OMG! If you are good with that and the “important people” can make it, you’re good.
Post # 10
I’m not having a Friday wedding, but just wanted to put in my two cents because I end up traveling a lot for weddings (I live in DC, no where near my or FI’s families/our high school friends).
I don’t mind taking a long weekend for a wedding, as long as I have enough time to adjust my work schedule. If it’s someone I love, I’ll be at the wedding whether I have to take Friday off, or if I can work a half-day. If the bride and the groom are respectful enough to give me a few months notice for the wedding, it won’t change my plans on attending. If they pick a Thursday night wedding, I get more annoyed, because then we get into having to take multiple days off from work.
So, long story short, send out some Save-The-Date Cards in a decent amount of time and I don’t think there would be a huge problem.
Post # 11
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
Because we’re having a short engagement (6 months), Fridays were the only option at our venue. Yes, it means people have to take a day or half day off work. Some may miss our ceremony (6pm), but a couple of people are excited about taking the day off, having a long weekend, etc.