(Closed) Friday Pity Party – Sorry for venting

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
1893 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I think you need to say all of these things to him.  You’ve been together 14 years, you are more than entitled to be upset that he won’t put his money where his mouth is and make an honest woman out of you.  Take responsibility for your own happiness and stop allowing him to call all of the shots.

Post # 4
542 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I agree wtih lezlers, this is tough, and you have more than done your time here. This is not fair to you anymore. I would be just as hurt, angry and resentful as you are. And I am sure it gets worse with each passing year. Do you really want those feelings clouding how you truly feel about your s/o? Of course you love him dearly or you wouldn’t still be with him, but honestly, this is just not fair anymore. He is completely dictating this entire relationship. You are both adults and have been together longer than many marriages even last. You deserve more, frankly. You shouldn’t have to make excuses as to why wanting to be his wife would just be easier. I totally understand, you just want to be his WIFE, not his girlfriend. I totally don’t blame you. You need to have a serious talk with your man about all of this. He is being really unfair to you and needs to get his priorities straight.

Good luck!! Sorry you are going though this! Best of luck! *Hugs!*

Post # 5
1670 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I think it is time for a serious talk.  I’m in the same boat as you.  Been with my SO for 11 yrs and had several ups and downs with family and other stuff through the years but now that I’m in my thirties there are no excuses anymore.  I’ve already told my SO to think about what he wants in his life and told him that I want to be married and have kids soon.  Now I just have to bring it up again.  I’ve come to the conclusion that if he is not on the same page then we should part ways because I don’t want to have any more regrets in my life.  If my SO is not onboard with me then I guess he is not the right person for me for this stage of my life.  I think you should do the same with your man.  Figure out where each of you picture your future life.  If it is not the same picture figure out what needs to be done to get there even if it means parting ways.  It’s your life.  I just came to the same conclusion.  Good Luck.  Keep us posted.

Post # 6
442 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2015


I have to agree with PP’s enough is enough, you put in enough time, lets get married. You can no longer wait for him to make up his mind. You need to tell him either marry me or I’m gone. Why wait around another 2  years for him to say just give me another year in a half. 

Post # 7
161 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

You seem like you are already accepting of the fact that he is not going to propose to you anytime soon.  You said you dont want to break up whether you marry or not.  Just remember how much you love him and want him to be happy.

Is 2 years a for sure thing or is he just saying that to make you feel better and figures you will forget about what he said 2 years from now.  If he plans on proposing in 2 years, Halloween of 2012, you can start planning your wedding for November 2012.  See how he reacts when you show him the venue you booked today for your November 2012 wedding.  Then ask him what he wants your colors to be.  Ok, ok, you probably shouldnt do that, but wouldnt it be fun?


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