Post # 1
What was the price range on your registry? We didn’t have a registry so I don’t know what the average is, but a friend is getting married soon and it seems like their registry is very expensive :/ Their wedding is in the next state over in a very small town so it will be a 12 hour drive to get there (there are no flights there as it is too small and no big cities are anywhere close). 75% of their registry items are $170+ and the few cheaper items are a $40 garlic press, $37 ladle, and $35 pair of salad tongs. Only a few items have already been bought and they are $200 items so its not like the cheaper items have already been bought.
It’s going to use up our vacation time plus money in gas and accomodations to get to this wedding. am I just being cheap? DH and I are on kind of a tight budget right now since we have a lot of credit card debt that we’re trying to pay down.
Post # 3
I thought if you did a Destination Wedding you didn’t really do a registry? Was I wrong in this?
Post # 4
@auroraborealis: Well my registry has items from $5 up to $500 (oh that elusive vaccum…)
but if another couple has an expensive one that doesn’t mean you have to buy from it. You can gift what you’re able to regardless of what they want. 🙂
@suburbian: I don’t think its really a destination wedding… its 1 State over in a small town, its just a long drive for the OP
Post # 5
Yikes! That seems a little inappropiate when they are having a Destination Wedding.
We had a Target registry for the more affordable things and a Macy’s registry (my mom’s wish) for anyone that wanted to spend more.
Post # 6
You can buy the cheaper things on the regsitry even if it seems like a lot of money for one thing. Just determine how much you’re willing to spend — people register for nicer things than they would probably buy with their own money. I know we did on our physical registry, but we also are doing a honeyfund with a range from $5 to $100.
I will say, my bestie had a regsitry that was ridiculous. 15 items, all over $100. I gave her a gift card instead. If you’re uncomfortable dropping $35 for salad tongs (which I totally understand) don’t feel weird to give a gift certificate or cash. These are completely appropriate gifts for a wedding.
Finally, I think it’s worth a reminder that a gift is not necessary. I don’t expect all of our guests to give us gifts, especially if they’re traveling — traveling costs a lot of money.
Post # 7
Just give them a card with a check or cash in it if you don’t to overspend on the registry, that’s what we do for all the weddings we go to. I’m sure they’ll appreciate anything considering what you’re spending to attend the wedding.
Post # 8
@auroraborealis: I’m having a destination wedding and even though I didnt want a shower my mother insisted on it. We went to a fairly inexpensive store and put items on our regisrty ranging from $5 to $200 (with the $200 item being a long shot that anyone would buy it) I dont see the purpose in putting large ticketed items all over your registry especially if you are having people spend money to attend your wedding
Post # 9
@Elky: majority of their friends live in the same city as us, and their families live several states away, so its pretty much a Destination Wedding for everyone
Post # 10
I don’t think it’s anyones place to judge someone elses registry. They registered for what they wanted. You can always give them a gift card or cash if you can’t find anything you’d like to give them from the registry.
Post # 11
Gifts aren’t mandatory, but they’re expected. If you don’t like the registry choices then get them a gift card to one of the stores and a nice, thoughtful card.
Post # 12
Personally, my registry has items from $2 to $300. I figured that would give people the ability to customize how much they want to spend or allow people to go in for gifts together.
Is there any particular reason why you wouldn’t want to give money? If not that, then another gift I’ve seen is buying assorted bottles of wine for the couple to opened at different times (http://www.libbyjamesblog.com/2012/03/23/wine-poem-basket-aka-the-no-fail-shower-gift/)
Post # 13
thanks for the advice! We can spend more than $30 (probably $50 is our max though) on a gift, but I just feel weird buying them a pair of salad tongs and nothing else, does that make sense?
Post # 15
@BeachBride2014: I’ve always bought off of registries because I figure if someone is registering for something, then that’s what they want the most. I figure if they didn’t want these items, then they wouldn’t have registered (I guess that’s how I was brought up and I still buy for people that way)
But giving a check isn’t out of the question, I’ve just never done that when a couple has a registry
Post # 16
Our most expensive item is a pot/pan set that’s about $500 at full price (but often goes on sale), but I’m not expecting anyone to shell out that much $$ on us. I’m anticipating a few gift cards that I could then combine together to buy that set we desperately need. Regardless of what the gifts are like I plan on buying that set after the wedding, by adding it to my registry I get a discount and earn points towards it when I buy it after the wedding.
That said we also have lots of $10 items in our registry.
Also my understanding from the (2) weddings I went to is that most people give gifts at the showers and bring cash/gift cards to the ceremony. It makes it a lot easi on the guests to just show up on the big day with an easy light weight card. I would imagine that’s even more-so the case for a Destination Wedding.