Post # 1
My friend had been dating and living with this guy for a while. He has a son who is 9 and lives out of state. He has a custody arrangement with his ex. A while back my friend started writing things online about her boyfriend’s ex that simply weren’t true. Apparently the ex discussed this with him and he asked my friend about it and my friend denied it. Around a week ago my friend’s boyfriend snooped on her phone while she was asleep and found the evidence that it was her all along. He was angry and broke up with her. He also kicked her out of the apartment. She is currently staying with one of our friends.
My friend just found out she is pregnant and insists on keeping the baby. She has been trying to get ahold of him and he ignores her completely. He does come into the restaurant where I work a couple of nights per week. My friend wants me to talk to him and try to get him to view her in a favorable light. I really don’t see why I should get involved. I feel bad for my friend but she got herself in this predicament. Should I get involved?
Post # 2
Nope. He’s a regular and if he complains to your manager, you could get fired. Don’t get involved for your friend, she’s a hot mess.
Post # 3
The only way you should get involved is to be there for your friend. If your friend wants to confront her ex then she needs to do it. She should not ask you to talk to him.
If he approaches you and asks after her then I think you should encourage him to talk to her and leave it at that.
Post # 4
Sounds like an incredibly personal situation. Unless you are extremely close with both of them, I’d stay out of it and just do what you can to support your friend. It sounds like you know she is in the wrong, but if she means a lot to you, that’s probably the best thing you can do for her.
Post # 5
The absolute most I would do is tell him she’s pregnant if she asked me to. But trying to get him to think better of her? No. She knows what she did is wrong. He wasn’t willing to put up with someone bad mouthing his child’s mom and that is a very good sign. If he goes in a lot let her come in and wait for him. Or she can write him a letter. Whatever. This is her problem- not yours. Her behavior thus far has been very immature and you shouldn’t be a part of it.
Post # 6
Omg no do not get involved. This is up to her, not you. Why did she post that stuff about his ex? Pretty immature.
Post # 7
Do not get involved. There is no way that this go well for you.
Post # 8
- Wedding: September 2014 - Merritt Winery
Nope. Don’t get involved. A true friend would not ask you to jeopardize your job. She created this situation by lying and she needs to remedy it. If he asks about her, sure, tell him about her situation. But I wouldn’t try to talk her up. She seems full-o-drama.
Post # 9
Are you sure she’s really pregnant, because if she likes to make things up…..?
Post # 10
I wouldn’t drop the news of her pregnancy on him but I would probably ask him to call her and tell him it’s actually a pretty important thing that isn’t about his ex or his breakup with your friend. If he is going to be a father, he needs to know this sooner rather than later.
Post # 11
I agree with Erin418. If this guy is a paying customer at your place of work and you corner him to talk to him, you could lose your job. While I understand you want to be there for your friend. I think it best that she continue to reach out to him.
Post # 12
Nope. Do not let her personal mess interfer with your income. She has some nerve. Playing games with her relationship blew up in her face. She has to deal with the consequences now.
Post # 13
Thanks for the replies. I don’t think that I should get involved. I definitely do feel bad for her. Her background isn’t great and this was her first relationship. She thought they would have been engaged by early 2014 and since then she’s been not acting right.