(Closed) Friend is jealous of my SO

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
31 posts
Newbee

hahaha my SO does have friends that are growing up a little slower than he is, but most of them are engaged and getting married!! They all tell him not to get married (jokingly, nothing against me). If getting engaged and married turn him into them, then I would have to agree with their suggestion of not getting married. lol ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 5
Member
301 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

My Fiance and I have a friend that was jealous of our relationship. We’ve been to gether for over 3 years now and we own a house and have good jobs. Our friend (who is a year older then we are) decided to knock up his girl friend, get married before the baby came, and move out into a little apartment so they had their own place, (this was all before Fiance and I got engaged) and now this friend is spending his years in jail, because him and his “wife” never got along and things happen.

Kinda sad, because he basically just felt that my Fiance and I were more ahead of him in life and he wanted to “pass us up” as he said. He felt he sould be married first and have kids first.

Post # 7
Member
289 posts
Helper bee

This is actually really sweet – I would be so touched to hear this. Most of my SO’s friends give him hell about his “old man” ways (i.e. often staying in with me on Friday nights rather than going out drinking with the boys), and tease him about being “tied down” as you mentioned. None of P’s close friends are in serious relationships – some still even live with their parents to avoid any ‘big boy’ responsibility and obligation.

I think P sometimes has a harder time daydreaming about our wedding considering the lack or interest or support from his friends – this can make me feel a little bummed for him. I, on the other hand, have several giddy girlfriends who are either married or engaged themselves, so it’s a completely different vibe.

 

Post # 8
Member
3305 posts
Sugar bee

@MsBrooklynA: My SO had 2 bestfriends- both were engaged and trying to steer him away from it… I guess they didn’t want him to change as they have with the engagement. He ended up stepping away from them for a while, and both broke off their engagements (weird) so he is making sure they don’t influence him. Both of them aren’t ready to grow up- they still living at home with theit moms and they are almost in their mid-30s.

I am glad your SO’s friends value what you guys have, should like they are trying to make the steps to grow up and be MEN.

Post # 9
Member
301 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@MsBrooklynA: We have only had the jealous competition between a friend. But yours is so sweet. I wish he had more friends that would want to be more like him in that sense :”]] Just figured I’d share my story

Post # 10
Member
2808 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

It’s funny, isn’t it? Some of FI’s friends have gotten this way as well. A few of them are just happy for us, but are still enjoying the bachelor lifestyle. On other other hand, some of them have started badgering me to keep my eyes open for nice, single girls to bring around. Some of them are still working on getting their act together, but there have been two engagements in our friend group this year and I think it has started to affect the way that some of them view their current situation.

Even the descriptions of the type of girls that they want has changed. Educated, financially responsible (not well-off, just responsible), level-headed, and not some “easy or cheap” girl…someone with real value who is looking for a stable  and serious relationship. Most of them are still pretty hardcore bachelors, but I think that watching your friends grow up and move forward with their lives flips a switch in some people’s heads.

With men, it seems that one of them needs to take the plunge, so to speak, first before the rest of them follow. A few of his buddies (awesome guys who I have become close with over the course of our relationship) have commented to me that they wish they had what we have. It’s kind of heartwarming to see them understand how much we mean to each other. Men are funny, aren’t they?

Post # 11
Member
5572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

My Fiance has friends like this. Last year one of his best baseball friends from college lived with us for about 6 months and one night I had stayed up later than Fiance and was hanging out with his friend and his brother (who also lives with us). They had been drinking a little and they started talking about how they wanted what Fiance and I have. They were so sweet about it, I definitely took it as a compliment too ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 12
Member
151 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

My Fiance has friends like this too. One night, when all of us went out for drinks, one of FI’s friends and I had a heart to heart, and he basically told me that even if men tease each other about settling down and getting tied down, secretly he wants what my Fiance and I have. I was really surprised to hear him say that, and thought it was really sweet.

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