(Closed) Friend officiating, Gift/cash?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
2161 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

We had a friend officiate, and we got her a gift (jewelry). I think the same gift as the groomsmen would be nice. I would err on the side on a gift for him, rather than a thank you dinner (since essentially, you are already buying him a thank you dinner -the reception). But that is just my .02. I definitely wouldnt do cash, though. 

Post # 3
2133 posts
Buzzing bee

FI’s brother is officiating our wedding. Giving him the same gift as groomsmen (engraved pint glass)

Post # 4
804 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015 - Southern Plantation House

To be generous, I would give him the same gift as the groomsmen + a giftcard to a nice restaurant. He is performing a larger role in the wedding than a groomsmen and everyone loves restaurant giftcards!

Post # 5
528 posts
Busy bee

Our officiant was a family friend and a good friend’s dad so we gave him a Yeti tumbler (which was one of the items we gave our groomsmen too) and a gift card to a really nice restaurant.

Post # 6
614 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

My friend was our officiant, she did amazing! We gifted her with wine and a $100 gift card to the spa! I think if it’s a friend a gift is the best way to show your thanks!

Post # 7
605 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

I’m getting my friend a gift card to a spa ($100). We would have had to pay someone to do if she wouldn’t have been able to do it, plus I just think it’s a nice thing to do. 

ETA: my friend is officiating. Should have mentioned that. 🙂

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 11 months ago by  ValAsInVal.
Post # 8
9575 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

My uncle officiated. He’s an established (also- wealthy) grown up so money would be weird. We gave him a nice leather portfolio that we embossed for him to use in the ceremony when we asked him.

After the wedding, we sent a thank you card and as itd be typical to donate to an officiating revs church, we told him we would donate 300$ in his honor to a charity of his choice. He was excited about that. 

Post # 9
4236 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

View original reply
herrera2016:  I had one of my best friends officiate my wedding. If she had not officiated, she would have been a bridesmaid. I got her the same calibar of gift that my bridesmaids received and added a little something extra. I would just get him a groomsman gift. I would not count a thank you dinner as a sufficient enough thank you (he’s going to the reception, I imagine–that’s the thank you dinner). 

Post # 11
1078 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

My friend is officiating as well – very excited about it!  We are paying for his accommodations, but beyond that I may talk to my Fiance about getting him some good college basketball or football tickets.  It’s not what the groomsmen are getting – but it is a huge common thread between us, and something that we know he will love

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