(Closed) Friend out of control!

posted 4 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
284 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

You need to say something to your friend’s boyfriend. This would not look good for him if he was found to have knowledge of this. Saying damaging things about a child’s mother could affect the custody arrangements that the father has. Especially if it’s on a website, your friend’s ISP could be found and then she could be in serious legal trouble (slander charges)

Your friend could really be making things difficult for her Boyfriend or Best Friend if she’s not careful.

Post # 4
12248 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Kacey23:  that’s just creepy and wrong. It’s good of you to look out for his son, ultimately. How awful for the mom and everyone involved. I hope someone can talk some sense into her. 

Post # 5
7673 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Kacey23:  Definitely confront your friend.

Tell her it is hurtful to the mother and if she finds out who did it the mother could make life very uncomfortable for her. e.g. there is a site (I forget its name) where women post things about their ex’s new partner (i.e. your friend), so the mother could do that in retaliation. Also she could sue – libel is libel even if it’s on the internet.

Also, if she’s a Christian (as I know you are from past posts) you could remind her that lying is wrong and tearing people down is wrong. WWJD and all that.

Post # 7
967 posts
Busy bee

Send her an email:

I wanted you to know that I am really struggling with what you wrote online about Boy’s mother. Besides the fact that it seems really out-of-character for you to be so vindictive towards someone you’ve never met, it concerns me that you would care so little about Boy. What you’re doing could have very serious ramifications that could turn his entire world upside down and I’m shocked that you would indulge being mean and petty at an innocent child’s expense.

Please stop. Please go to that site and delete your posts. If you can’t delete them, explain that none of what you wrote is true and you shouldn’t have said it. Do it for Boy and his well-being. I will be checking the site. If your posts aren’t deleted or set straight 3 days from now, I will inform your Boyfriend. I think it’s imperative that he – as a father – is aware of the kind of person he is allowing in his son’t life.

Post # 8
2815 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

What an awful, immature human being. I would confront her, and tell her boyfriend.

Who the heck goes around badmouthing a child’s mother, whom they’ve never even met? Like WTactual F.

Post # 9
6018 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

Normally I’m someone who would advise to stay out of such situations. However, in this case, this could have severe consequences for all involved. It could be life changing should this stuff blow up. Especially for the child, which would be my main concern. I would confront her and if she didn’t take them down or address it properly I would let her know I was going to tell her boyfriend. It’s just ridiculous that she would even do something like that.

Post # 12
1001 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015 - City Hall!

That’s disgusting. I’m sorry you’re put in this spot, but yes, something needs to be done. How would everyone feel if CPS looked into what was being said and took the boy away??? (If it’s of a child abuse nature) What if she lost her job? Things could really affect people’s lives, and unforutnately, people forget that when they’re behind a computer screen. Not okay. 


I wouldn’t even give her a chance to fix it, what if she does it again and just doesn’t tell you. I’d go right to the boyfriend and see if I could contact the mother (via facebook maybe). 


How awful. 

Post # 13
590 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Kacey23:  If her comments are untrue it could affect the child custody agreement in place between the mother and father of this boy. If the mother brings this to court and argues that your friend is a toxic influence in her child’s life and is spreading things about her online the court may revoke the father’s access to his son until he removes this negative influence (your friend) from his life. 

Also if the mother can prove that the comments made online have affected her life (i.e. she’s lost a job, been demoted, etc.) she can take legal action against your friend for libel. So yes, her action can have a variety of legal consequences and can also have consequences for your friends relationship. If the father is forced to choose (at the order of a court) between access to his son or a relationship with your friend I think we all know which he would choose. 

Post # 15
284 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

It may be out of character, but this is a CHILD we’re talking about. Sorry, my concern is strictly for the child and not your friend. You need to go straight to the boyfriend and let him know what’s going on. If the boy’s mother finds out on her own, she would likely take the boy’s father to court and he could potentially lose any visitation rights to his son. Please do the right thing and go to the boyfriend. I know you don’t know him well, but for the sake of the boy, please do it.

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