Post # 1
I need advice! I got engaged at Christmas and I booked my venue the following month. A friend of mine just got engaged a month ago and has scheduled her wedding for the same day. She lives 20 hours away from me. We were close in university and shared the same group of friends. We haven’t been as close the past couple of years but we keep in touch and I still consider her a good friend. She said she thought my wedding was in a different month and that other times don’t work for her. I don’t think it’s a huge deal but it does hurt my feelings a bit and I think it will put some of our friends in awkward positions.
What do you guys think? Does this warrant being upset?
Post # 3
I would be a little upset, especially if some friends will have to decide who to pick. If I were you, I’d get your STD’s out ASAP! 🙂
Post # 4
Also, I told her my wedding date several times and she said she wouldn’t miss it for the world..Haha
Post # 5
I would be bummed because some friends will have to choose which wedding to go to. Seems like something she should have ‘double checked’ with first!
Post # 6
It seems odd to me that even if you two aren’t close anymore, she wouldn’t ask some of your mutual friends when you were holding your wedding. If it were me, I’d want to make sure all the crossover friends could make my wedding, and I’d avoid booking it on your day. I’d say you have every right to be upset about it, but I honestly have no clue how to handle it. I’ll look forward to the responses from other bees!
Post # 7
You already told her the date, but didn’t save out Save-The-Date Cards. Maybe she really made a mistake, maybe she didn’t. Either way, it’s booked.
But even if you send out your Save-The-Date Cards first, I think the mutual friends are just going to go to the wedding of the person that they are closest with.
Perhaps you guys can schedule a date sometime after the wedding where you and all your mutual friends can get together and you and your friend can bring your wedding pictures so you can all share?
Post # 8
I’d be a little pissed as well! OP I totally understand where you’re coming from! Its possible that it was an honest mistake and your friend forgot or had your wedding written down for a different month. As PP mentioned, send out your Save-The-Date Cards asap!
Post # 9
I would be upset! It seems very bizarre she wouldnt double check with you because you have so many mutual friends! As others have said, send out Save-The-Date Cards soon to cover yourself, but your mutual friends probably are just going to go to the wedding of whoever they are closest too, no matter whose STD they get first. It is what it is …
Post # 10
I would be pissed! I would talk to her calmy and rationally and see if one of you can switch your date.
Post # 11
i would defintely be upset. i got engaged valentines day and booked my wedding in april. later that month on a girls trip i asked two of my gf’s from college to be bridesmaids.
one of them just got engaged and is planning a destination wedding within a month of my wedding….so all our friends will have to take a day off for mine and a couple days off for hers? i was mad about the same month, i cant imagine the same day!
it sounds like geographically you guys are pretty far apart, so maybe that will help make your friends decisions easier?? do most of your friends live close to you or are they also far away?
maybe if the plane rides/car rides dont take care of it….start talking to your mutual friends. explain the situation at hand and explain how much it would mean to you if they attended your big day. sure its kind of “poaching friends” if you will….but she started it!
Post # 12
Wow, this is straight out of Bride Wars! I agree with others – send out your Save-The-Date Cards STAT! Then watch Bride Wars.
Post # 13
I’m sorry! That’s frustrating. Especially since you guys have mutual friends. Unfortunately there doesn’t seem to be much you can do, except send out invites and see who’s coming.
Post # 14
@swarlesk: hahahahha!! I was thinking the same thing – June wedding at the Plaza!! lol
Post # 15
it sucks but oh, well, what’s done is done. don’t dwell on it or it will make your whole planning process miserable.
unfortunately it will put some friends in awkward positions.
Post # 16
i wouldn’t care that much you don’t seem all that close anymore. It is what it is, I wouldn’t waste your energy being upset about it.