(Closed) Friend Situation – Help Please!

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1135 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

I’m sorry you’re dealing with this.  Unfortunately, there is only so much you can do to maintain a friendship when your efforts are one-sided.  I think one more email is not out of line, but in it, I would be perfectly frank–tell her that you haven’t heard from her, you feel like you’ve been trying really hard, and not getting any response.  Let her know that you’ll always be here, but that you’re going to leave her alone until she decides to get in touch with her.  You’re working very hard, and she’s making it pretty clear that she is not willing to make the same kind of effort.  I think it’s fine to make one last attempt, but at a certain point, you need to give yourself a break, and wait to see if your email touches a nerve with her, and hopefully she’ll come to you.

Post # 4
Member
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I wouldn’t get too upset yet. It’s true people do get very busy and I myself even find that all of a sudden quite some time has gone by and I haven’t spoken to a particular friend. When is her wedding date? Could she possibly be jumping into planning already? Visiting venues and vedors?

If you have a gut feeling that it could be something else then I would email her and just ask her straight out what’s going on. At least then you’ll know…

Post # 5
Member
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I don’t think you’re “losing a friend” or anything that severe. I mean, she just got engaged. She’s probably getting bombarded with emails and questions from everyone about “how’s it going with the planning?” and stuff like that. I personally don’t like talking about it with people and respond vagely to questions about my wedding planing so maybe she’s the same way. I don’t think it has anything to do with your friendship. People get busy, like you said.

Post # 6
Member
385 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

As someone who kind of sucks at communication, I would say not to over-react here!  She’s probably swamped in post-engagement bliss / pre-wedding stuff.  If this is super unusual, I’d send her an email letting her know that she’s neglecting her friends.  Something along the lines of what mrsmdphd said, but don’t over dramatize it.  You’re not losing a friend.  You’ve just got a crazy busy friend.  🙂 

Post # 7
Member
5263 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

Ditto everyone else… I got so many calls, emails, messages, etc when we got engaged that it was overwhelming. Plus I had work and the end of the quarter to deal with, so I didn’t get back to many people for a few weeks. It wasn’t intentional, just part of being busy.

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