- 5 years ago
- Wedding: September 2013
I think I already know what I should do here, so slight venting and slight asking for advice.
So last night I got a text from a “friend” saying
“Hey, when is your wedding? I need to know so I can keep the date free”
She isn’t invited! I suspected this was coming but am still not sure how to deal with it. I either have to invite her (which I don’t want to do) or explain to her that I don’t like her any more. The latter is really scary and equally something I really don’t want to do.
Additionally if I invite her, I need to invite another couple I know, who I would like to be there but our guest list is already a bit long. What would you do?
As some background
There is a girl I have known since I started uni so for 13 years. We used to be quite close friends, she was a bit socially awkward but an okay person, as I saw her often it was assumed that if I got married, she’d be a bridesmaid.
However, about 6 or 7 years she got really bad RSI in her wrists and since then she’s turned into someone I really don’t like. She takes advantage of people, she lived rent free with friends or boyfriends for years, claiming she couldn’t afford to pay rent when she had over £50k in the bank. She would even break up with boyfriends and then not move out of their house and have the audacity to then complain that they didn’t talk to her enough – she dumped then and then wouldn’t leave their house – jeeze. She has just bought a house outright, cash despite not working for years due to this using other and yet still managed to claim that it was really unfair that her mum didn’t give her £5k for furnishings just because she isn’t working.
In general she just always complains, she is suffering from depression but for years I have listened to her complain and do nothing about it (I have depression issues to but am dealing with them with CBT and at times medication). She refuses to consider any job as it’s not software programming, but she can’t do that because of her wrists. Plus she has terrible personal hygine – she always smells and never brushes her hair. She’s just so selfish and I’ve been trying to break the friendship by just not seeing her and ignoring her calls and texts for the last year (I know it’s wimply).
Another concern is that if she did come, she is the type of person who would follow me around all day and that would be annoying. I also feel sorry for anyone who has to sit on a table with her.
So the way I see it, I have 2 options.
1: Invite her and the other couple
2: Man up and meet up with her to explain that she’s not invited, and that I don’t want her as a friend any more.
I don’t want to do either. Any suggestions, if you can think of another way out, do let me know.