- 7 years ago
- Wedding: November 2011
First off, I have to say I am very grateful for our friend’s help, but he needs to realize it’s not HIS wedding!
Long before Fiance and I were ever engaged our friend has been making comments about handling our wedding invitations and all “design” elements of our wedding as well as the photography. He himself, co-owns a wedding invitation company, is a graphic designer, and a wedding photographer, so you know…an *expert*.
We tried as hard as we could to politely decilne his help saying things like “oh no, we don’t want you to work during our wedding we want to celebrate WITH you.” no, didn’t work…. they had a son about 4 months before we got engaged (we are the god parents) so we tried using the “oh, you’ve got your hands full with your businesses and baby you don’t need to help us” no, didn’t work….so rather than trying to hurt his feelings by just going and doing things on our own terms, our own way, I’ve sat there and just smile and nodded throughout this whole process. Now our invitations are going to print, and I HATE THEM. I like the logo he made for us, but that’s it. The colors aren’t the right shades (not all purples were created equal!) I don’t want to be mean and tell him I don’t like it and make him start all over, so I just keep smiling and nodding, venting to Fiance and praying Fiance will speak up for me, but he fails too. He will politely suggest “oh can we use a darker shade of purple” and our friendor goes “that’s ugly” yes, i’m not joking….so aside from being a bridezilla and saying LOOK BUDDY IT’S OUR WEDDING AND WE WANT A DARKER SHADE! I don’t know what to do.
The other annoying thing is since he’s the so called expert whenever I tell him how I plan/want to do things (i.e programs, table numbers, candy jar display, etc) he says “I’ve seen that done before, you should do this instead” ….uhh okay, what’s wrong with that? OR he says “I’ve never seen it done that way before, no one does it that way, you should do this!” …umm okay…. STFU and let me do what I WANT.
Let’s not even get started on the photography part…..
FI’s solution to the design elements are to just keep doing what I want and smile and nod to his face if I don’t want to stand up for myself. (I don’t want to be rude!) But I know he will be upset/annoyed when he sees everything on the wedding day isn’t what HE designed. And we are the godparents of his kids, so I don’t want to ruin a friendship over a stupid wedding.
Thanks for listening…any advice on how you would’ve handled this situation is welcomed =)