Post # 1
do many of you get constant questions from friends and family about when it’s going to happen? I’ve only confided in one friend and a work colleague that I’m waiting! But it seems my friends and family are waiting too!! Ever since last summer I get it ALL the time! Just yesterday my sister asked me when was it going to happen, and was giving me her ideas for venues! If everyone else is waiting why is he?! sniff
Post # 3
I completely empathise with this! I get it a lot, and there are two people that do it more than most; MrWigeon’s uncle and the quizmaster at the pub quiz we attend lol.
I’ve got to the point where I generally just smile and say nothing now as I don’t know what to do or how else to respond!
Post # 4
My mom asks all the time “so when are you guys getting engaged?” I HAVE NO IDEA! not up to me! A couple Xmas’s ago we went to SO’s Aunts and his grandma sat down beside me and said “sowheres the ring?!”. SOs mom will make comments about it. And my friends – every bday or anniversary they’ll say “so did you get a ring?”. I try to keep myexcitement and hopes to myself but I’m not the only one I guess!
Post # 5
I feel you…
We’ve been together for a long time and many many ask me what’s going on with him and why we are not getting married…
I tell everybody that we are not really ready to get married – somewhat true, althouth I’ve been thinking I am ready for about from 9-10 months ago, financially/maturity wise. Also tell everyone that hey, getting married is not always the asnwer. Both need to feel they are ready and rushed decisions could lead to an unfavorable future!
Hang in there.
Post # 6
I’ve been with my SO for 4.5 years. He’s 28 I’m 27. All of our friends are engaged, married, or close to that and none of them have been together as long as we have. my mom has given up asking me about it bc she doesn’t know what his deal is. I’ve been asked by every single one of his friends what’s taking him so long (as if I’m the one to be asking!)…so I completely understand. It’s very frustrating to say the least. I told him, tell your friends not to bring it up to me anymore…I can’t handle it.
Post # 7
I know exactly how you feel. SO used to work at my current place of employment. A couple years after he left I started working there. Everyone I work with was very excited when they found we were together. Now that we have been together for a while (I am in late twenties hes in mid 30’s) everyone asks me (very often) when we are getting engaged. My mother constatntly asks “did you get your ring yet?” I just play it off and laugh, but it hurts. Its like their reminding me that im still not good enough to marry yet.
Post # 8
I’m 27 and my SO is 34… I’m like – come on, you are old enough… :/ I’m not upset that other people are married already and that’s why I want to get married… It just seems like the right step for us. I want to move on with the relationship… maybe we do not have the financial stability but my situation is so complex, I moved across the world for him. I’ve been here almost 2 years and I am still only a girlfiend, it’s just sad. My mom doesn’t believe SO willl marry me, it really hurts, because I find myself in doubt. I mean, he would as me eventually, but I don’t want to wait another year or two. I’m supersad today!
Post # 9
@LoveWillLightTheWay: I know how you feel, I feel exactly as I am not good enough. My mom will never ask me directly but she doesn’t believe SO wants to marry me.
Post # 10
@Littleapple22: Yeah, I agree. I hate when people ask ME, sometimes in front of my SO. How thoughtless!!!! I scream inside: “Why are you asking me, ask HIM!!!!!”… It hurts.
So what are the good responses you suggest (something witty to make the person who asks inappropriate question ashamed ;))
Post # 11
The ppl that really bug me are work colleagues, they don’t even know my partner or our relationship! and its always from the married women! I think its just a way to get a dig in at me, as i’ve been promoted twice in my 2 years there! Like this one time this female work colleague said ” oh you’ve still got lots of time, what age are you again?” i replied “29” ( this was last year) she kinda screwed her face up and said “oohhhh” as if that was it, i may forget about it, i was officially an old maid! So i need come backs for colleagues that won’t get me fired! i’ve also decided when we do get engaged (positive thinking! 🙂 I’m not making a big announcement in work, I’m just gonna let them catch a glimpse of my hand and wait for them to ask! he he!!
i’ve stopped telling them about weekend breaks with my partner, cos i can’t handle the questions and hinting! we’re planning on going to the states in November and that will be a big holiday, as we’re based in the UK, so I know when i’m heading off on that trip i will get it ten fold!!!
I might just say ” married? but i’m not divorced from my 3rd husband yet” or “oh we broke up AAAAAAAGES ago” or ” why would i get married it seems to have aged you badly?!”
oh that feels good to just even write that down! my family and friends i can handle better cos i know its coming from a good place! but theres always a few out there i feel that are using this as a bit of one upmanship. Or maybe its just me being oversensitive. Has anyone else found this?
Post # 12
Strangely no one ever asked me that :S (except I friend when I was complementing her e-ring).
Not his family nor mine and we are together for 7 years! Now that you mention it, it’s kind of odd that no one asked before.
Post # 13
First post, had to reply to this one!
We got this constantly. We only got engaged recently, after 8 years together. Around 5 years together, one day his mother asked us directly. His family is catholic, 7 kids and he’s the only one not married. So you can imagine the impatience… Anyway, we decided a date, far far in advance at that stage, to tell her to just shut her up. She was mega surprised to have a different response, and was flabbergasted. After telling her this date, she never asked anymore, just mentioned the date sometimes and how she couldn’t wait for it. Everyone else just gave up asking us. My family went through the marriage then divorce of my brother after 1 year, so they just forgot.
A few months ago he finally popped the question. We’ll get married on the date we told his mum (2016!), because for various reasons it just works and feels right after all these years.
Post # 14
Omg I get this questions all the time. From friends, family, coworkers… everyone. We’ve been together 7+ years and I’ve been getting these questions for a few years. At first (like 3 years ago) I wasn’t ready to get married either so I was fine just saying we’re not ready. Now I just feel like screaming “well, I’M ready!” Lol, but he is finishing up school still so I usually just tell people that and they back off a little.
Post # 15
We’ve been questioned by some frieds, but I recently went back to school, so most of the questions have stopped. Work collegues have asked many times. His parents were together 7 years before getting married, so they aren’t rushin us. Although it’s almost been that long for us!
Post # 16
We’ve been together for almost 3 years and I have been getting this constantly for I would say the last year. We both know we want to be together forever, but he doesn’t want to rush into a marriage as he has seen both of his older brothers get themselves into some not so good situations. It is annoying when people constantly ask but I’ve learned to deal.