Post # 1
Had the vow renewal last night and it was AMAZING!!! THe weather was perfect, the guests danced the night away, and everyone told me it was the best and most beautiful wedding they had ever been to. However, a friend just posted some pics her husband took and I can’t help but pick out how large I look!!! I never show my arms and they stand out to me a lot in all the pics, plus my waist is not skinny and boy does it show. I’m not sure how our professional pics will come out and we won’t get a sneak peak until a week from now. How did all you ladies handle looking at the pics. I know there will be some I hate, but I’m hoping there will be more that I love. What if I look like a huge fat whale in all of them?? What if I have a double chin in all of them? I can’t redo the whole day just because I was fat and want a redo!!!
It didn’t help that my mom never told me I looked beautiful, she never does…even when I do actually look beautiful…but I was really hoping on my wedding day she would stop her antics and just be a supportive mom for once. We talked about it today and I feel a little better about it, but I’m so nervous about how the pics will turn out. We paid so much for a top of the line photographer that if they don’t come out good the only person I can blame is myself for not losing all this damn weight.
I also have a little of the wedding-is-over-blues. Any encouragement welcome!! But please no “oh get over it” comments. I don’t think my nerves can take it. 🙁
Post # 3
No one likes seeing themselves in pics. Please don’t let it get to you. I’ve had thin women, full-figured women, short women, tall women, you name it, all sit in front of me and point out their figure flaws to me. Everything — they hate their elbows, their knees, their arms (almost everyone hates the arms!) We are hard on ourselves, you know?
But, with your pro pics taken by a great photographer, they’ll know how to take the most flattering photos. My best times are when I’ve had women find a photo I’ve taken and tell me “I’ve never felt this way about a photo of me!” Then I know I’ve done something worthwhile 🙂
Post # 4
I’m sorry you’re having a hard time with your mom. We’re all our own worst critics, and if the pictures really ARE bad, hopefully your photographer had the skill to get you from some better angles. I don’t understand why people like to post unflattering photos on facebook. I have an aunt who always just dumps her entire camera on there after family get togethers, and I always end up with pictures where she’s got me from behind bending over, or with a mouth full of food or something. Terrible.
Post # 5
My brother posted a pic I didn’t care for the day after our wedding. My hubby made it his FB pic for a few days. I complained at first but then in a few hours there were a lot more pics of the wedding/reception being posted on FB that were a lot more flattering. Basically, I quickly got over it. Everyone knows every pic isn’t going to be perfect.
Post # 6
blu77 Thank you. That really means a lot and makes sense. We are all critical of ourselves. I think it’s different for me being that I’m a plus sized woman and the flaws I see really are there…not just something only I see. It makes me feel better to know that everybody hates there arms though!! Awesome! And my double chin, WTH!! I was laughing in so many pictures and it totally made it worse. But at least I was happy!
Thanks for the kind words ladies!!
Post # 7
@NYshoppingirl: I think you should focus on how happy you and your hubby were and how beautiful you felt and how beautiful he feels you are! We are all insecure in many ways and I know I worry about getting too many pics with my double chin showing. Your will undoubtedly have GREAT professional pics and will find some that you absolutely love. The wedding is over – no more stressing. 🙂 I’m glad it went so well! Congrats!
Post # 8
I can totally relate! We actually gave guests a card with info for a password-protected website for posting pictures b/c I was not looking forward to pics of me on FB…(luckily most guests are middle-aged and not so FB-happy so it seems to have worked). But I still have this AACK reaction to most of the pics I’ve seen so far of me. I also have a few pro preview pics and there’s one or two I feel good about, so I’m trying to focus on those.
I can also relate to the thought that you’re somehow to blame if you don’t get flattering photos of yourself, but I don’t agree with that, for me or you or anyone else. I think somewhere between my thought that I look big as a house and people’s comments that I looked beautiful is a middle ground where I can accept that I am big but that I did look nice (beautiful? I’m working on that LOL)… maybe happy? Beaming? Joyful? and what else does a bride need?
At any rate, hope any of that helped, if only to say you’re not alone in this.
Post # 9
@NYshoppingirl: girl we are usually our own worse critics. Plus your friend is not a professional and doesnt know about flattering angles etc. I’m sure you were beautiful and the pics are gonna be dazzling!
Post # 10
I honestly am sure you looked AMAZING! Even though your friend’s pics may make you think otherwise! I hate that! Makes me feel crazy sometimes, like what I see in the mirror isnt what I should be seeing! GRRR!
Plus as others have said, we tend to be our own worst critics! Go easy on yourself my dear! I can only imagine you looked BEAUTIFUL!
Post # 11
I wanna see the pics! You’re probably being way too hard on yourself! Can you link us to her fb or upload them on here?
Post # 12
I would guess you are being overly critical. We all beat up on ourselves about how we look in pictures. I can relate with the arms and chin… I hate my arms, and I always seem to have a triple chin in pictures (I am going to have to remind myself…chin out…alll day on our wedding). Totally agree with earlier posters that everyone does this to themselves, I am sure the photos will be gorgoeous, and will capture the joy you felt in the day. Focus on how much you love your hubby right now, and bask in the gooshiness of your love!!
Post # 13
HOW MANY YEARS HAVE YOU BEEN MARRIED? MY HUBBY AND I ARE RENEWING OUR WEDDING VOWS IN OCTOBER (20 YEARS) :-).
Post # 14
pokie Having the vow renewal was such a wonderful experience!! Our first wedding wasn’t a wedding at all, so it was great to experience all this for the first time. How wonderful to have been married 20 years and now renew your vows, congratulations!!
karenski Thank you so much for the encouragment! I must have read your comments a thousand times because it made me feel so much better. And you know what? You and everyone else who posted on here was totally 100% right!!! The friend pics were ok, but the sneak peak of the professional pics are amazing!!! They couldn’t have turned out better!! And while not every photo is my favorite most of them I REALLY LOVE!! We get all the photos back in 2 weeks and I can’t wait!! Check out one of my favs:
Post # 16
I love that photo! you look great!