(Closed) FRUSTRATED AS [email protected]#%#!!! [LONG] LACK OF ACKNOWLEDGEMENT ABOUT ENGAGEMENT/WEDDING!!

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 19
Member
4753 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Consider yourself LUCKY. Ladies here will tell you ON AND ON AND ON about how many times people ask about the wedding and feel the need to give unsolicited opinions and advice that YOU DO NOT WANT. Trust me, you’re lucky.

Post # 20
Member
38 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I got engaged and only the people who were the closest to me seemed happy for me. (this was only four people) I was not acknowledged by any of my family even after our engagement was posted on FB. I was devastated! To make matters worse, another girl I work with was proposed to only three weeks after me, and in Paris at the top of the eiffle tower, so my engagement was pushed to the side and quickly forgotten.

I understand your frustration, but I do think you should not put so much emphasis on what others think or how they respond. Your wedding is about you and your FI! So it should be everything you dream of. 

I dont really have a solution for you, just wanted you to know that there are others who share your frustration. 

Post # 21
Hostess
1425 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’m gonna be straightforward and honest… and blunt. Your engagement is only “fantastic and amazing” to you. The world doesn’t revolve around your engagement/your wedding planning, etc. There was another thread here about a wedding “spotlight” that the bee was upset that the light wasn’t shining on her.

With that said, ENJOY it for YOURSELF and stop having expectations for other people. Expectations = disappointment. And no, you don’t get to claim the “week” “month” or even “year” of your wedding. πŸ˜‰

Post # 24
Member
2959 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I am planning the wedding 100% by myself. The sad fact is that people get married all the time, it is a typical life event and to many, not that big of a deal. Yes, it would be very nice if the people closest to you seemed more excited, but it is better to let go of expectations than to be constantly disappointed.

Post # 25
Hostess
1425 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
@confusedfrustratedbride:  I’m sorry his parents aren’t more excited about it for you; its their loss frankly. Glad to hear you’re not a spotlight type bride! I just feel that from your post you’re frustration is stemming from an expectation you have for the people/family around you and you were asking for advice on how to deal with it. Get rid of the expectations and no one can disappoint you. Revel in the fact that you Fiance and you are getting hitched!

Post # 28
Member
1434 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2019 - City, State

View original reply
@FauxPas2012:  You know, I think that a major path toward happiness in life is to release expectations of others. Embrace any joyful expressions of your forthcoming marriage and enjoy them. Don’t dwell on communications that seem to–by your standards–be lacking.

Yes, FauxPas2012-“san,” I was going to say just that, but it’s not “a” major path. It’s “The” major path. Expectations are what causes us to basically hurt ourselves and then turn around and hurt others who had no idea what had been expected of them.

Plus, once you release all expections, you can truly enjoy what life brings, because after all, you didn’t EXPECT it! 

Now, Honeybee1999-san must add that the key to a bride’s path toward happiness is learning that NO ONE gives a damn about your wedding like you do. If OP’s wedding is actually in 2017, Then I’m completely sure that it’s not on anyone’s radar.

While I understand that OP is excited and wants others to be, too, the wedding isn’t happening to them. It’s only happening to the bride and groom. Others just watch. So until there’s something to see or help with, people will just go about their business. 

I think Fiance might not have told his mom why you were at the store because he didn’t want to get into any long drawn out question match. If I had told my mom I was at the craft store looking at wedding stuff, I probably would have gotten a million questions from “I thought the wedding was in 2017?” to “What are you doing that for?” to “Well, what’s the colors? Themes? What’d you find?” So he could have been avoiding whatever his mother’s brand of quesitoning would be.

Post # 29
Member
1434 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2019 - City, State

View original reply
@confusedfrustratedbride:  No, we have set the date for a fall wedding next year.


What is the 2017 date all about?

Post # 30
Member
1434 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2019 - City, State

View original reply
@vmec:  Consider yourself LUCKY. Ladies here will tell you ON AND ON AND ON about how many times people ask about the wedding and feel the need to give unsolicited opinions and advice that YOU DO NOT WANT. Trust me, you’re lucky.


And soliticiting for invites! Don’t forget that! lol

Post # 31
Member
6261 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

I’m sure it just doesn’t feel real because it’s so far off, and it seems like your Fiance doesn’t talk to her a lot about it. Once it gets closer and you start planning details, I’m sure they will take it more seriously.

It sounds like you’re nit picking way too much about liking things on facebook and being over the top excited for you. She did acknowledge it- just not in a million different ways. If you don’t calm down, it will damage your relationship because you will resent her when she didn’t really do anything wrong.

The topic ‘FRUSTRATED AS [email protected]#%#!!! [LONG] LACK OF ACKNOWLEDGEMENT ABOUT ENGAGEMENT/WEDDING!!’ is closed to new replies.

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