(Closed) Frustrated, trying to lose weight, long post and need help

posted 5 years ago in Fitness
Post # 3
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Staionary bikes are awesome, at my peak I can break 800 cals an hour! You need to eat healthy, green smoothies, and sounds like a spin class or classes with instructors would suit you better than trying to work out on your own.


I need someone to push me or competition otherwise I won’t want to push myself.

Post # 4
2390 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Have you tried Weight Watchers???  It’s the ONLY thing that’s ever worked for me.  I’ve lost 30 pounds on my way to 100 – and haven’t had to give up anything.  As you already know, it’s all about portion control.  Having an actual plan to follow is the only thing that works for me because just starving yourself doesn’t work long term.  

Give it a shot!

Post # 6
5958 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@AllyCRN:  First, you have to get rid of this shame you carry around….everyone has something that’s harder than everything else….for some people its managing their weight, some people are terrible with money, others can’t really maintain a relationship or only find abusive people attractive…you show me anyone, I’ll show you a fallable, flawed and beautiful person…including you.

Second, stop focusing on the scale, the calories and the amount of time you excercise and start focusing on the things that make you feel good…not in that junk food bender way, where you get it over with and mow down an extra value meal from McD’s because you had a bad day….we’re talking about the things that make you feel stronger, healthier and alive.

If you hate the bike, try something else…there’s a lot of things that make you fit, that don’t really fall into that drill, sweat and repeat category…what about fencing, ballroom dance, aerial arts, how about something outdoors with animals?  A lot of horse rescues need volunteers and pitching hay is one hell of an aerobic workout….the point is, find your thing, something that works for you, don’t be afraid to explore, and discover that perfect fit.

Third, catch yourself doing things right.

Fourth, redefine your reward system with non-food related items

Fifth – reward yourself generously for sticking to your plan, its a gift that keeps on giving, but no one ever died from a pair of Jimmy Choos…you know what I’m sayin?

Post # 7
9682 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@Nona99:  +1. The best exercise is the one that you are going to do. If you hate something and will struggle each and every day to force yourself to do it, then that is not going to work for you in the long term. You need to find something you enjoy. So what if it doesn’t burn as many calories as a boot camp class? It is something you will stick with and that is far more important.

Also a +1 to the non-food reward system. I don’t weigh myself, I go based on how I feel and how my clothes fit. I have milestones to reach and I buy something nice for myself when I reach them. However, I don’t believe in depriving yourself either or else it can lead to binging. Don’t eat the bag of M&Ms, but you can eat 6. Just be smart with your food choices and celebrate when you make the right ones!

Post # 8
230 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Right now, I am counting calories. I keep it reasonable and walk my dog each day. I have lost twelve pounds in two months. once in a while, ill eat something bad like a cheat meal, but I feel so bad after it I dont ever want junk food. Loosing weight is burning more calories than you take in, so I just count calories for NoW. it’s tough but it’s working!

Post # 9
467 posts
Helper bee

@AllyCRN:  I’m beyond broke, (and currently unemployed) so I started running.  I’m doing couch to 5k and IT IS FANTASTIC!  It starts off super slow, and really gets you into the grove of running.  My mother and I are doing it together, and neither of us ever ran before.  You can burn a lot of calories running, and it gets you outside.    

Also, you should start calorie counting.  If you are working out and still gaining weight, its because you are eating the wrong things.  You are going to have to make a change.  Don’t get me wrong, I love pizza and beer, but I had no IDEA how many calories were in a slice until I started calorie counting.  I use an app called my fitness pal which gives you the approximate amount of any calories I am eating.  Now when I’m looking at food, I try to decide if its worth the amount of calories I am going to eat.  If you eat fewer calories than you expend, you will loose weight.  🙂  

Post # 12
5958 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@AllyCRN:  You are so good at finding reasons why something won’t work:

I don’t have money

I don’t have time

I have too much homework

And I totally understand each and every one of those reasons…but the difference between feeling sorry for yourself and feeling empowered is having all those obstacles and finding a way regardless.

When I was a student, I was literally so fucking broke, I would take dates from guys I met at the bar I worked at so I could eat….rent in Manhattan combined with my tuition was killing me!  I posed nude in art classes for the extra scratch and worked crazy hours at a bar for the tips to make ends meet.

I certainly couldn’t afford anything extra…but a walk down to Tiffany’s, looking in the windows, was a treat.  A visit to the museum to see Pollock’s Autumn Rhythm was a favorite pass time, a old used copy of a book of poems for .75 that I bought at a rummage sale worked.

I found a way, and you certainly can if you’re willing to look for it and avail yourself to what it demands of you.

Post # 13
193 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Do weight watchers. It’s amazing. You never have to starve yourself and you don’t have to deprive yourself of anything…they just teach you how to eat. If you follow their program, you WILL lose weight, even if you don’t exercise. Weight Watchers is the only thing that works long term.

Post # 14
412 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

@Nona99:  +1

Where there is a will, there is a way. When I was in college, I worked two jobs to support myself (I moved out and paid for all of my expenses). I still managed to find time to stay healthy and learned to cook from fresh ingredients, which was actually a lot cheaper.

Weight loss is 80% diet and 20% exercise. Try to eat things that are nutritious and keep that lifestyle. You mentioned that you lost weight in the past – your eating habits need to be a LIFESTYLE change not a temporary “diet.”

Find an activity that you enjoy doing. It doesn’t have to be hardcore, just something to get you out and about for starters. E.g.: go hiking several times a week with some friends. Once again, this needs to be a LIFESTYLE change.

I think the #1 thing that you need to change is to BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. Stop coming up with excuses, and start seeing yourself reaching your full potential. You mention that you blow all of your money on retail therapy. This is the EXACT same thing as overeating – you’re overindulging and can’t control yourself. This will be important for you to learn moving forward in life, and doing it in a way that will help your health is well worth it in so many ways.

Post # 16
2082 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@AllyCRN:  I was in a similar situation as you about 12 years ago. I joined Weight Watchers and Curves for women. Weight Watchers increased my awareness regarding what is healthy and gave me options on what I could eat. It was a lifestyle I was able to maintain. Curves appealed to me because it was a 30 minute work-out, good for gym newbees, and all women. I didn’t feel judged, and they also did monthly weight checks and measurements so I could see my progress. I initially lost 20 pounds with Weight Watchers before my weight plateaued at 133. After joining Curves I was able to lose another 20 pounds. Now, I go to regular gym several times a week to increase my muscle mass and fitness level. I find that eating foods with high fiber and protein give more satisfaction and energy. I still use Weight Watchers as a guideline to maintain my weight.

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