- 8 years ago
Going anonymous for this one… I don’t know what I want from posting this. Just need to get out my frustration I guess. It’s about a bridesmaid, my best friend from high school, who I stood up in her wedding in 2007. Basically, where our friendship took a giant turn was the day I got engaged. Or I guess, technically a little before that. She started realizing her feelings for her husband were not what she thought they were and was into her supervisor at work. I was just “eh” about the whole thing thinking she’d realize in the end her husband was what she needed and who she loved. So, still married to her husband, the day we got engaged, I called her to tell her the good news, and she tells me flat out, she’s getting divorced. I mean, telling people you got engaged, you all know how it is, you’re excited, nothing can bring you down, except when you hear this. You’re excited, high on life and now… don’t know what to say? Sorry? It was like she just cut in when I had a HUGE smile on my face with this. At first I felt awful b/c I thought she didn’t have a right to tell me this news right when I told her mine. But obviously she couldn’t help the timing, so I let it slide.
Anyways, the whole divorce/other man situation was hard on me, I don’t know why. I think it’s because she confided A LOT of information in me, I think too much. Which is why I think I began pushing her away. At one point I told her I had heard too much. I had a hard time with relationship commitment as it was, and just being in this new step in my life, I felt like she was making it a joke. We took a long time apart, not talking so much b/c every time we did it was about HIM (the new guy). Not even kidding, there was not one time we got together where the subject didn’t revolve around him and their new relationship. Anyways, most of this falling out happened the end of 2008 early 2009 (when we got engaged). We didn’t really talk till around August 2009 and since then I have only seen her a few times. We call, text, and facebook, but lately she has been driving me crazy. I began reaching out to her, as I said the end of last year, and I make every attempt to make amends/get together, she always says she misses me and wants to get together, but she’s always “busy” even thought her facebook fills me in that her life fits in fine with other people.
So, the point of this post is, in addition to having gone through all the above, she started texting me things recently, first it was “what time is your wedding? I’m trying to figure out if I need to take a ½ day off work or a full day?” I know my wedding is on a Friday, but my bridesmaids new this going into it, and all 6 others are taking the day off, some even the day before by their own choice. We are getting picked up at 2:30 for the church (obv. need to be ready for pictures and stuff beforehand, same as we did for HER wedding), so even if she did take a ½ day, that puts her at 12noon getting out of work (at least a half hour away from where we live), did she plan on being in any of the pictures, getting ready with me, helping me get ready? I mean come on! Then, a few weeks later I get, “what time does your shower start?” and then later “is july 31st set in stone for your bachelorette party?” like I feel like everything is a big inconvenience for her. At least, that’s how she’s making it seem. So she also just graduated this past Sunday and I told her I wanted to take her to an upcoming concert as her gift. When I asked what she had going on that day, she said she might be going to 6 Flags. So when I told her to let me know in the next few days, she tells me she’ll pass.
I don’t know, she is still an important person to me, but I just am about ready to give up on her. I wouldn’t drop a Bridesmaid or Best Man, but I’m just so aggravated, I don’t want to make any effort anymore. I feel like she caused this. This isn’t even ALL the details, but I TRIED to keep it as short as possible.
Do I have a right to feel this way? I need some outside feedback. Thanks girls!