- 6 years ago
- Wedding: April 2013
I have been with my Fiance for 4 years and we ar recently engaged. My Future Sister-In-Law is my age, and my Fiance is 2 years older than both of us. She is not necessarily mean, just kind of quiet, and annoyingly enough impossible for me to form any kind of relationship with. We all recently graduated college and we are living in our respective homes (FI and I are moving out in a few weeks), so it isn’t like we aren’t around each other a lot, but she will still walk into a room and say nothing to me (not even “hello”) and really seems to operate like she’s in her own little world to the point that it is just rude.
I try to include her in things, especially because I wasn’t sure if I should make her a bridesmaid as a nice gesture. Fiance and I invited some friends out for a celebration of sorts since we recently got engaged. We went to a bar (so it wasn’t a formal engagement party, obviously) and I invited his sister, who didn’t respond, but did show up…. along with about 10 of her friends. Okay, so it’s a bar, fine. One of my friends brought 2 friends as well. The difference was that Future Sister-In-Law and her friends sat at the table next to us, backs turned and didn’t speak to me at all. In fact, they didn’t speak to ANY OF US at all, even though we TRIED to talk to them.
I’m not trying to be selfish, and I’m not typically a “me me me” kind of person… but we were out to CELEBRATE OUR ENGAGEMENT…. and she was RUDE. Friends of mine who had seen her before said hello to her without a reply. Now, if she was so shy and quiet and that was the reason she was weird…well I have been around her for FOUR YEARS so it shouldn’t be that awkward when I have always been openly friendly and tried to include her, and she brought AS MANY PEOPLE AS I DID so she clearly doesn’t have a problem being social when she wants to be. The only time she talked to me was when I confirmed that I would be driving her & her boyfriend home. So I stopped drinking very early in the evening so that I could drive a group of people and not have to get one or more cabs.
THEN she told my Fiance she was getting a ride home with someone else and left WHILE I was in the bathroom with a few friends, so I essentially came out to an empty table (which was slightly okay since, as I said, no one spoke to me anyway, but still…rude to not even say “hey, thanks for inviting me” or “good bye”… or even to say anything when I dropped Fiance off later that night as she was home when we came in).
Of course Fiance doesn’t see a problem because “at least she came” and “all her friends congratulated him when they left”. Um, how nice for you. They congratulated you and left and I WASN’T EVEN THERE. AND I had been planning on being Dirty Delete for HER and she left, without even telling ME.
I just don’t understand why I keep trying to be nice, and she has to be this silent brick wall of a bitch. If you’re going to show up to OUR party, don’t bring an entire group of people, set up a table separately and completely ignore us all night! Just don’t come at all!
I originally thought it would be nice to ask her to be a bridesmaid, but now it just seems like it will be miserable if I do that. I really just can’t stand her, and I’m hurt about the way she continues to act. I have let similar things go in the past, and we have never fought about anything (how can we, she won’t speak to me like a normal person). I keep thinking I can get to know her better by spending time with her, but clearly the more time I spend near her, the more she pisses me off.