(Closed) "Fuck Off" fund. Do you have one?

posted 4 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 2
Member
180 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

Don’t know if it’s the same thing, but we keep several thousand dollars in an emergency fund.

Post # 3
Member
302 posts
Helper bee

I think I kind of understand where you are coming from. Like, if you suddenly broke up you’d have money?

no I dont have one, everything is joint with Darling Husband

  • This reply was modified 3 years, 10 months ago by  paperose9635.
Post # 6
Member
2639 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa

leekissesme:  No, but I could clean out our bank accounts and it would take him several days, at least, to notice lol. He doesn’t do any of the banking/bill paying. I’ve considered making one, but decided against it. Even if things got really bad and he cleaned out the account before me, I have friends near by to help in the short term (gas money to get away) and family (my parents) to help in the long term while I sort things out, if it ever came to that.

I don’t think I’ll ever need it, but I suppose many women think that.

ETA: I guess that isn’t entirely true, because the Schwab account is only in my name. Theres only about $100 in it, though.

  • This reply was modified 3 years, 10 months ago by  gingerkitten.
Post # 7
Member
9595 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

I do have some money in my name only (not a lot). But to be honest, if something terrible happened out of no where like cheating or abuse, I have my parents and brother as a safety net. Theyd buy my plane ticket (or Id throw it on our CC) and I’d move in with them. 

Post # 8
Member
3541 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

Darling Husband and I both have our own savings and checking accounts (and joint).  Neither one of us keep our money separate in case anything were to happen with us though. He keeps his money separate so he can surprise me gift wise, and I have my savings so I have my own money that I don’t have to feel guilty about spending. 

ETA-  we both make roughly the same amount, and are financially independent. Plus I know it’s clique, but we both trust each other (ive seen him do the right thing when very few people would have). And we both own the house so it’s not like either of us can kick the other one out if something were to happen. I did have a back up plan with my ex Fiance. 

Post # 9
Member
9570 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

leekissesme:  No… we have seperate money, since our inheritances are to be kept seperate from one another and never considered joint property, but I definitely don’t actively make sure i have an “escape plan” of some sort.  We have a prenup, so it’s not that I’m pretending life doesn’t happen… but actively saving money in case if I need to leave my Fiance feels so… insincere.  I’m all in!

Post # 10
Member
302 posts
Helper bee

leekissesme:  Well I feel like it would be keeping a secret from Darling Husband, and almost lying by omission? I have thought about it in the past, with my ex bf…but def. not with Darling Husband. Plus if we were to get divorced, I think that money would be split up and found during discovery? 

So no, in the end, I do not feel comfertable doing it and would not have a “fuck off” fund.

Post # 11
Member
212 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

I have a savings account that in my father’s name and mine Fiance will have no access to it ever. I do think it’s smart to have some money put aside just in case. I’ve had that account since I was born, so I don’t feel guilty about having it,  none of the money that we will make jointly will be put into that account. After we marry we will still have personal money, and I will continue to save money from my personal money in that account. Fiance also has his own personal savings account.

Post # 12
Member
356 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

I don’t. Partly because I would feel like I was lying to my SO. But mainly because I would feel like I was somehow investing in the break up of our relationship. I guess I’d worry that if I was always planning on a get out plan that I’d need one because my heart wouldn’t be 100% in it. Like a self fulfilling prophecy – if I create a break up fund I’ll need it. 

However I do understand why people might want to have one if they don’t feel totally secure in their relationship.

Post # 15
Member
2109 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Definitely not. Everything we have is 100% joint. I trust him with my life, why wouldn’t I trust him with my money? (Even typing my money felt weird. It’s our money.)

The topic ‘"Fuck Off" fund. Do you have one?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors