(Closed) Funny regional oddities between our families

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
2116 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

My mom and Kingy’s mom, although from opposite hemispheres, are so laid back about etiquette and planning that we haven’t noticed a huge difference family-wise. I, on the other hand, am much more by the book and extravagant than both of them, so they both think I’m a little nuts.

 

Example, Future Mother-In-Law wanted to hand deliver save the dates to family at a party she was going to and I asked if she minded if I sent them out- she laughed a little, but I don’t think she minded. As for my mom, she thinks I can mail invited out like the day before the wedding… is she insane?

Post # 4
Member
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Yup…this is/was our situation, although we are the opposite; my family is much more traditional and formal than his.  I think that the main reason  this didn’t cause big big problems is that, as the bride, I got to make most of the decisions (from their viewpoint).  If the roles had been reversed, there would probably have been more problems.

Honestly, most of the problems/stresses were mine.  I tried REALLY hard and looked for ways that everyone could be as comfortable as possible…it didn’t always work.  I felt that I was in the middle a lot of the time and my Darling Husband, having lived in Toronto for over 10 years and having become more “fancy” (God, I came to hate that word as it was thrown at me often in a negative way) and used to things being more formal, was somewhat concerned that he would look like an ass to his family.  We fought a bit…I cried a lot about really dumb stuff (the registry was a big BIG issue for us, formality of dress, etc).

Here’s what I learned: do what makes you comfortable and behave in a way that makes you proud.  Ignore everyone else.  It’s their own insecurities that make them make negative comments (if your situation gets to that). 

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