(Closed) Future Brother in law stole our wedding ring now what?

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
3303 posts
Sugar bee

I would get that ring back as its engraved. Sorry this happened to you.

Post # 4
Member
2281 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’ve been robbed, and the sick feeling goes away for the most part over time, but a small bit of it stays always. But, the association of the sick feeling with the object stolen does go away, and you have your stuff back! (I did not get back all the things that were stolen, but the ones I did I was glad to have. They didn’t feel tainted, they felt MINE).

Go get your ring back. If you don’t mind filing a police report, you can get the ring back for free because that pawn shop accepted stolen goods. I understand that may cause more family drama because your Future Brother-In-Law will be in even more trouble. I would also explain all this to the pawn shop owner, since you can use it to bring the cost down (if you want to pay and not file the police report).

But all of you need to do this openly in front of Future Brother-In-Law so he knows you’re on to him and cleaning up his mess. He will keep stealing from you all, and he needs to know he got caught.

Post # 5
Member
10288 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

I would get the ring back and press charges. You BIL deserves to be sent back to prison. You don’t steal from family. 

Post # 6
Member
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I would report the ring as stolen. Future Brother-In-Law should be held accountable for his actions. 

Post # 7
Member
3626 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@UpstateCait:   I agree. But even if you can’t being yourself to report him, I’d cut all ties.

Post # 8
Member
1064 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

After my fiasco yesterday (my FI’s car was broken in to and I lost a good amount of things), I’d sure as hell get my ring back. File a police report screw your Future Brother-In-Law I’m sick of people getting away with this. I might have had a different view on Friday but not now. 

Post # 9
Member
2697 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@UpstateCait:  Agreed. Go get your ring.

Post # 10
Member
986 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

 

What a mess.  I imagine you feel the ring is tainted. But buying your own ring would be tainted. It’s there ritual you could perform to cleanse the ring in your mind.  Maybe have you minister bless it or do a crystal cleanse?  It is the ring you man worked hard to buy for you. 

 

 

Post # 11
Member
2450 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

i believe if a pawn shop accepts stolen merchandise (even if they didn’t know it), you can get it back if you file a police report about the items stolen (details) and if the merchandise at the pawn shop matches the police report exactly.

Post # 12
Member
827 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

File a police report and get your ring back. Your Future Brother-In-Law had not authority to pawn the ring and the pawn shop should return the ring to you- it’s stolen property!

Post # 13
Member
764 posts
Busy bee

I don’t understand why you wrote up this whole story, but didn’t discuss why you didn’t immediately go to the police.  You’re worried about someone who isn’t thinking about you. He didn’t care about the sadness and financial impact to you. If he didn’t care about FAMILY do you think he cares about other people? Sending him back to jail isn’t JUST about you.. It’s about protecting society. That ring represents something more if it already went through something and found its way back to you! Girl get your ring!!!

Post # 14
Member
745 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Go to the police and file a report. Plain and simple. I believe the pawn shop has to hand it over, as it is stolen. This jerk has stolen from his brother and his mom. He needs to pay for what he’s done. Especially if this is a pattern of criminal behavior. 

And I agree with what Mrs. Timmy said. Have it blessed, cleansed, whatever you have to do. If you loved it before, and it’s the ring he picked out for you, don’t let this criminal ruin that for you.

Edit: If yours has stones, and your fiance’s is more plain, he may have thought the other one wasn’t worth as much. And do not buy it back from the shop. Tell the owner it was stoen and, again, file a police report. This person will keep doing it if he doesn’t get taken to task for it.

Post # 15
Member
389 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

There’s no need to buy the ring back if it was stolen. Report it, let the police give it back to you. Make Future Brother-In-Law accountable for his actions. 

I don’t really understand how the ring feels tainted now.. I had my purse stolen years ago with meaningful things in there, and there’s so many times I feel guilty about it being gone, although it wasn’t my fault, and just wish I had it back.

I still get livid when I think about it and if I knew who did it, you better believe I’d make that person feel just as miserable as I am. Taking away someone elses property is not okay. 

 

Post # 16
Member
501 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2023

I echo the PP in that you should go to the police and get the ring back for free. And report Future Brother-In-Law. 

He has the capacity to do a lot more damage along the way if he’s not caught out now. I know a couple who had most of the wedding gifts stolen from their car by the bride’s sister and the sister’s husband (both of whom were recently out of jail). They didn’t find out until they got back from their honeymoon, by which time all of the stolen gifts were sold or used and broken. 

Don’t let the situation get worse with your brother in law – nip it in the bud now before he takes something completely irreplacable. 

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