(Closed) Future FIL is on my last nerve. Argh!

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1130 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

If he’s not paying, he doesn’t get to invite people. End of story. 

Post # 5
Member
2497 posts
Buzzing bee

On the flip side of what PP said, if he’s paying for the rehearsal dinner, he can invite whomever he wants. 

Post # 6
Member
5966 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

So frustrating!  That is rediculous!!!  I’d be super mad too.

 

I completley agree with you, you need to get Fiance to talk to him and sort him out.  I understand that he wants these people there, but you’ve cut close family and friends and he’s not even paying.  Sheesh!

Post # 8
Member
2497 posts
Buzzing bee

@cali_cat:  In that case, no way are these random people coming to the rehearsal dinner. So sorry you have to deal with such a pushy Future Father-In-Law.

Post # 10
Member
1849 posts
Buzzing bee

He is a master manipulator who likes to bully people and get his way, isn’t he?  Will Fiance speak up about this?

Post # 11
Member
4687 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

I would call the people he invited, explain the situation and uninvite them. 

Then I’d call Father-In-Law and FREAK OUT.

Post # 12
Member
1181 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

tell him to pay for them, that you can’t afford to accomodate them…

Post # 13
Member
255 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I don’t care who’s paying for what, in the end it is your fiance and yours day! The parents are more than welcome to give you a list and say if there’s room, they’d really like these people invited.  My parents didn’t say a word about the list, just to invite who we wanted.  My fiance’s parents told us who they wanted invited but weren’t too strict about it.

Post # 14
Member
1348 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I would have told Future Father-In-Law to uninvite them and reimburse them for their tickets, but as you invited them, here’s what I’d do now-

Have Fiance call Future Father-In-Law and say NO! These people are not attending the rehearsal and that he is bashit crazy for thinking he had the right to invite anyone as he’s not contributing a cent. Then, depending on how pissed off I was at that point (I’d probably still be pretty mad) I’d tell him the bill for HIS guests is in the mail.

How rude!

Post # 15
Member
3692 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

You shouldn’t have invited them just because they already bought tickets.  They should have cancelled their trips and your Future Father-In-Law reiumbursed them for anything that was non-refundable.

But now you’re stuck because you sent them invitations.  You have to let them come to the wedding, but unless you or Fiance personally invited them to the rehearsal dinner, you don’t have to let them attend that.

Post # 16
Member
1130 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

So, you definitely don’t need to have them come to the rehearsal dinner. Have your Future Father-In-Law sort out that shit storm. My Future Father-In-Law and Future Mother-In-Law are going through a divorce right now so we were having some problems with the rehearsal dinner and such as one person is paying for it (her parents are, actually) and one is not. So, his mom got to do what she wanted because she’s paying for it. His dad used points for our honeymoon hotel as a gift, but he’s not paying for anything wedding related.

 

My parents and me and my fiance are paying for the wedding, and thank goodness my parents didn’t give money with strings attached, but holy smokes, not even giving money and then inviting randoms, no way!

 

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