(Closed) Future hubby not having many guests at wedding….

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 2
478 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

Are you close with his mom or sister? Maybe they could tell you if there are any family wedding traditions you could incorporate into the event. Also, could you plan some sort of surprise with his groomsmen? A special themed cake, or something to do with his home or childhood?

Otherwise I think you might have to take him at his word when he says it doesn’t bother him. I know you want to include him, but you might be making this more about how you feel then how he feels. I get it, I do it too.

Post # 3
1200 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015 - Malibou Lake Mountain Club

jules919 :  i would honor his request. I didnt want to invite many people from my side; i tend to be quite private with some things. Give him options but dont press it. He will LOVE the wedding no matter what; its about you and him <3

Post # 4
1298 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

My SO is from New Zealand and so had very few guests at our wedding (in the US). His parents, brother, uncle and aunt were able to make it from NZ. He said he was fine with it but I felt badly that I had 65+ family members and 25+ friends attending and he had so few. 

All the family arrived on the Wednesday before the wedding so we hosted drinks Wednesday for them (so the families could meet), did a dinner Thursday with a slightly larger crowd (so his family knew a few more people at the wedding), then did the Rehearsal Dinner Friday (again with some people they hadn’t met yet). This way they knew a fair number of people at the wedding.

I also contacted all my SO’s friends and family that had been invited but couldn’t attend. I had each record a short (30 sec) video giving their congratulations and warm wishes then compiled these into a single video to be played at the reception. It required organizing a projector, backdrop to play it, and arranging everything witht the DJ — but it was so worth it! SO was bowled over and LOVED it!

Post # 5
3870 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

jules919 :  Darling Husband only had eleven family members at our wedding and almost all of the friends he invited were mutual friends. Neither of us were really concerned about this. The facts were that while he has a larger family, I am closer with more family members/family friends than he is and so those who got an invite were people I had been close to my entire life. If my Darling Husband minded, he never once said anything. My family has COMPLETELY adopted him as one of their own and he was the life of the party. That being said, I more than happily incorporated whatever elements Darling Husband wanted because I did want him to have a presence at the wedding. 

Post # 6
489 posts
Helper bee

Even though we dont have any plans for a wedding, Fiance and I have talked about it and I have thought about it on my own too. He has said the only person he really cares if they are there or not is his best mate.  His preference would be to marry overseas and whoever wants to go can go but hes not fussed if they do or dont.. His family has an odd dynamic but they all get along. Even so he doesnt seem concerned if they couldnt attend.

I think for him its part practicality and part lack of sentimentality. He has just a few people that are super important, whereas for me I have many people that are important to me in different ways that I would want to attend. Maybe your Fiance is a bit this way too and he genuinely doesnt mind?

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