Post # 1
Bees, this woman is driving me nuts. Between my last post about her and today. I wanted today to be a GOOD day. Family, friends and food. What more could you ask for?
FI and I took my cousins and FIL & MIL to see our new house. It’s 5 minutes from my parents house so we did it after dinner before dessert. Well my cousins drove separate since they had a baby and FI drove his parents. In the car MIL says “You are much prettier than your cousin” Um, wtf?! I flipped. Even Mr. Lizzy got upset with her. And the worst part? This isn’t the first time she’s said something like this to me. She said the same thing a couple summers ago. I was so mad. I ignored her for the rest of the day but she kept trying to suck up to me telling me my mashed potatoes are TO DIE FOR. They’re just mashed potatoes. How I know EXACTLY how to decorate my home. Uh yeah because I don’t clutter it. How my outfit was just AMAZING. I wear this outfit often. Just made me so mad. I was so upset because I made all the desserts and was excited to present them to everyone but I couldn’t even get excited anymore.
I’m at my wits end. I’m tired of being nice to her when she’s just going to say hurtful things about my family. If you think I’m pretty, great. But DON’T compare me to my cousins (who are like my sisters that I never had) and tell me I’m prettier than them. I’d rather just not hear it at all.
I’m going to drown my sorrows in another slice of pie. 🙁
Post # 3
I don’t think what she said warrants the amount of anger that you are having now…. I mean, it’s not the most tactful comment, but it seems like she recognized that you didn’t appreciate the comment and was trying to make up for it. I’d give the poor lady a little bit of slack.
Post # 4
i think you might be overreacting a bit (but i havent checked to see if there are ongoing problems with her in other threads)
she was clumsily trying to compliment you. its not like she said “your cousin is an ugly heifer, shes so fugly i want to vomit”. honestly i think ignoring her the entire day is way too much. if you really found it offensive, why not say something like “i find it hurtful when you criticise my cousin even though its complimentary to me” and let it go
Post # 5
I don’t understand why you are this angry. Yeah she said you were prettier than you cousin, some people don’t know when they’ve said a little too much. I wouldn’t make a big deal out of it.
As for the rest, she was just saying nice things about you! I get how this can be unconfortable, but something to be pissed about? I don’t think so.
Maybe she is just exited, hyper or a little bit crazy… like we all ladies are.
Enjoy your pie, but with a smile on your face girl!
Post # 6
@Lizzy723: I think you need to change your attitude towards her. I kept waiting for the huge problem & didn’t see it. She seems to be able to tell that you don’t like her & is trying to be in your good graces.
I also read your last rant. It seems fairly innocuous & that perhaps you need to work on letting the little things go before they swallow you up. If she is over involved in your FI’s life, he needs to manage the situation.
Post # 7
@Lizzy723: I think you are really overreacting. She’s trying to be nice and compliment you, although it is in a socially awkward way. It sounds to me like you are just committed to disliking her. My two cents.
Post # 8
I think I’m mad is because this is the second time she’s said something like this to me, and the first time I was nice and said “that wasn’t very nice and I don’t appreciate it” then for her to say it again? I just don’t get it.
Post # 9
Yeah I wouldn’t be that upset. She’s just speaking her mind, even if you find it rude. I would just ignore it. No reason to ruin a Thanksgiving over it.
Post # 10
Sounds like she’s trying to be nice but doesn’t really know how to do it. It seems like you’re really overreacting about this.
I also read your last post about your FMIL and for the most part it just sounds like you don’t like her and you look for any reason to continue not liking her.
Perhaps things will seem better when your FI is no longer living with her.