Future wedding thoughts or COST?

posted 3 years ago in Themes
Post # 2
1202 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I feel like I’m having an elegant yet simple wedding and it’s going to be between $17-20K.  We got REALLY lucky with our venue + food so that helped keep our costs down.  I’m also a less is more person so the decor will be limited.  Weddings are not cheap, you just have to decide what is important and where to allocate the money properly. 

Post # 3
904 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

It isn’t cheap.  At all.  And it all adds up.  Our small little destination wedding is costing us $10k-$15k.  

That being said, you figure out what you don’t need, what you have to have and what you can spend and you make it work.

Post # 4
1004 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

Well there is a stat that says average costs of weddings are around the 32k mark. That is of course an average, taking in the weddings like your friend that costs 80k plus, and then there are weddings done on a budget. It also depends where you live, how many people attend, etc.

What do you consider “cheap?” My wedding was pretty elegant and it ended up being around 40k all in. But that was what I chose to do.

Personally, if you are not engaged yet I really wouldnt bother myself with wedding costs at the moment. You can have a beautiful wedding for 10k if you want, just have to make the budget work.


Post # 5
3534 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

khopenyc :  average in the US is 32k. The averages also vary by region. NYC are, for instance (not Including NYC itself) average is 52k. My wedding will be perfectly average…and cost about $52k for 100 people. Which is a shit ton of money. And no, that doesn’t include crazy decorators or even a wedding planner/day of coordinator. It’s a lot of DIY and my dress was $1100. Shit is just expensive where I am. 

You can have a wedding for cheaper, but it’s worth knowing what is average in your area and how far that goes. 

Post # 6
925 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - Vineyard on Long Island

When I started planning I was sickened by the idea that our budget was going to be around 60k to throw the type of wedding we wanted to do.  Now, when I hear something is a grand or two, my response is “oh, that seams appropriate”…. its terrible how expensive weddings are, but after probably 6 months of dreading spending a future down payment on our wedding, I’m now “used to it” =/

Post # 7
585 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

FutureMrsCoolWine :  This. I was so appalled by wedding prices when I first started planning but now I see it totally differently. I try really hard not to think about where those thousands could be going. for 120 people I’m spending about 3k on a venue, 8k on sit-down catering (a steal, I tell you), 600 on the church with the officiant and all that, 1.2k on a photographer (this is cheap, he’s cutting me a deal bc we’re friends), 1.2k on table and chair  rentals, 2.5k on a DJ w/ photo booth, $500 on a DIY video service, $500 on flowers. That’s about 16.5k already. All of these are honestly good deals for my area, but dayum, it adds up. I haven’t factored in the cake, my makeup and hair, all the stuff I bought to DIY my centerpieces, my invitations, my save-the-dates. Let alone the alcohol and rehearsal dinner, that my FI’s parents are paying for. That’s another 5-7k easily. I’m cringing right now, but that’s how much it costs. 

ETA: I’m not even going to GO THERE with my dress. I am wearing my mom’s dress and I had it altered quite a bit to be more modern and me. It cost a fortune, but my mom was really into it and wanted to pay. there are plenty of gorgeous and affordable dresses out there, so this doesn’t have to be an issue. It makes my head spin when I think about how much we dropped on that dress. lord above…

Post # 8
1558 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

khopenyc :  Are you in the U.S.? The national average for a wedding is right around ~$30K. The city where I live is about 10% higher. In my experience thus far – those figures are pretty accurate, and our guest list is at 180 (planning everything for ~120). It’s insane. I’d say my wedding is similar to the wedding my sister had 20 years ago, but her’s cost about ~10K (with inflation, that = $16K). So weddings have essentially doubled in cost in 20 years O.O

Post # 9
508 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

My wedding is going to be quite average, and still cost about 30K for 150 people.  Things are just expensive where I am (southern CT).  You’re definitely going to have sticker shock for a while

Post # 10
3583 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2016 - Manhattan, NY

  khopenyc :  I think the cost of weddings is outrageous. I was planning on DIY-ing my immediate family only wedding, and spending ~$5,000, not including the honeymoon (some people figure that into the cost). Ultimately, the stars aligned and we were able to have a unique wedding experience that was paid for, but we were lucky. Try entering some contests at bridal expos. A local jeweler put on a contest to provide an entire wedding to a couple, they didn’t even have to be engaged… Can’t hurt! 

Post # 11
2178 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

with weddings there is such a range of what is “elegant” that it is hard to say but the two things to keep in mind are fixed costs (ie photographer – doesn’t matter if you have 1000 or 1 person this will cost about the same, same with your dress – wear it just for Darling Husband or for 5000 ppl and it still cost the same) and then variable costs (ie food price – the more people the more food = more expensive)

one of the best ways to keep your wedding budget in check is to keep you guest list in check – food costs of $100/pp and alcohol at $50/pp isn’t uncommon so $150 x 50 ppl = $7500 (then add in tax/service etc so closer to $10K) vs $150 x 300 ppl = $45,000 (and with that other stuff closer to $60K)

Personally. I think that it would be hard to have what I would consider an “elegant” wedding (this would be things like plated dinners, passed apps, band playing music, nice florals on the table) for 200 ppl under $50K unless you have a lot of friends who owe you favors (or live in a very low COL area) …. however drop that guest list to 100 ppl and you could probably do it for $20K


Post # 12
468 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

My wedding was awesome. There were about 140 or so people and the whole thing was just over 13k.

Post # 13
9208 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

i had a very elegant wedding.  while my mom wanted the elegance and to spend the money, i am more budget friendly.  i wanted a $200 or less dress.  my mom was willing to spend up to $1500.  i found a beautiful dress for $800,  had I kept looking and had more time, i probably could have found one for less.

you can have a budget friendly, elegant wedding.  you just have to be smart, do your research, and stick to your budget.


ETA:  we opted for nonfloral centerpieces.  what i wanted if they were flowers was more than i thought was neccessary (even though my mom was happy to spend the money).  so we went a different direction.

Post # 14
9818 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Weddings aren’t cheap.  It really depends on your area for what is available and the cost.  It’s certainly possible to do a cheaper wedding under $5k or $10k but you might have to rethink or check your expectations.

I live in a midwest city (so not super high COL) and I did have a nicer venue, but NO decorator, no shipping flowers from the other side of the world, no videographer.  But I did have some nice flowers, good photographer, good (not extravagant) food, open bar, regular dress ($1k), and for 100 guests still spent $22k.  So I considered my very nice but certainly nothing extremely extravagant.  But on the other hand, I’ve had friends do it for way cheaper.  Still some super fun weddings, but I wouldn’t call them elegant I guess.  Much more casual and light on the decor and maybe did the food themselves (or had big families to help out) with keg beer or boxed wine. Or just bought liquor and let you mix your own (yep!).

If you really want to save money and have an elegant wedding then you need to limit the guest list (sometimes by a lot!).  Some things you will get what you pay for (photographer, food) unless you have some amazing friend or family member who is a professoinal and will give you a nice discount. 

Post # 15
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

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