(Closed) Garter

posted 5 years ago in Traditions
Post # 2
Member
30399 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

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aimeesita84:  Your husband (he will be by then) doesn’t have to go digging under your dress if he wants to throw the garter. There has always been a classy, dignified way to do this. It does not have to be a boorish display of his manliness.

You can lower the garter to below the knee ahead of time, or even just use a throwaway garter that you hand to him.

Post # 3
Member
2144 posts
Buzzing bee

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aimeesita84:  Talk him out of it because I can’t stand it Then we went to a weddingwhere they could find no one to catch the garter or the bouquet so it was 20 min. wasted of trying to drag people onto the floor. After that my Fiance agreed we should ditch it.  Win.

Post # 4
Member
191 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

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VictorianChick:  We are ditching it too – she doesn’t like the idea of me doing that to her in public, and she has no interest in throwing the bouquet. I don’t really care so it doesn’t bother me.

Post # 5
Member
6237 posts
Bee Keeper

I’ve only been to two weddings with a garter toss.  One where they tastelessly went under the bride’s dress (sorry but it’s too intimate a thing to do in front of friends/family IMO).  The other, I forget how he got it – probably the same way.  My boyfriend caught it out of pity – as in it fell on the floor b/c no one wanted it, so he picked it up.  I caught the bouquet, which was originally tossed into a chandelier. Random info: they divorced within six months, but we’re married now.  Thank goodness that wasn’t a cursed catch   I just don’t think most people are into the whole garter thing these days.

Post # 6
Member
343 posts
Helper bee

Ugh my fiancé wants me to wear a garter for the toss. I don’t want to do it bc quite frankly it’s a little invasive and one more thing To spend money on. hes like a dog with a bone too, he won’t let it go!  

Post # 7
Member
2144 posts
Buzzing bee

 

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libralove55:  wear it around your ankle! He wont have far to go then! 😉

Post # 8
Member
26 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2016

I am not a big fan of the garter toss and we won’t be doing that or the bouquet toss – one of the perks of a small second wedding. 

However, when one of my cousins got married she and her husband opted to do a garter toss and hands down it was the most entertaining one I’ve ever seen. They are both in the theatre and really hammed it up. Her dress was a massive ball gown and he did a bit of a showy dance routine before proceeding to pull out all sorts of odds and ends out from under her including a book on how to be a good husband, a rubber chicken, a baby doll, and even a sink (to this day I have no idea how they hid that). It was hilarious and they both made a big production of it that had all the guests laughing. 

Post # 9
Member
6574 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

This is one of the most cringeworthy traditions and i don’t think anyone is going to miss it if you skip it.

Post # 10
Member
539 posts
Busy bee

we didn’t want to do a toss because i thought it was super awkward, and i hadn’t seen many done recently.  i didnt even wear a garter. we didn’t do a bouquet toss, either. just had the band going the whole night without interruptions. worked out well!

Post # 11
Member
379 posts
Helper bee

I think it’s worthwhile to look into the tradition of the garter toss, and what it signifies, before deciding whether or not you want to wear it. I spent a lot of time researching the meaning of these traditions before deciding to do them or not. In the case of the garter toss, it’s a modified version of the tradition where the bride’s dress would be ripped by guests, because a piece of her clothing was considered good luck (because of the virginity/purity).

http://www.bridebox.com/blog/everything-need-know-wedding-garter/

I wasn’t about this, and I’m not a virgin, so I opted out. I also find it a bit vulgar, seeing my guy friends jump over one another to catch it. And, as someone who has unknowingly caught a tossed bouquet, only to realize she needs to sit and have some random guy put the garter back on her thigh, I didn’t want to impose this on any of my friends.

In the process of researching, I did find out a lot about Queen Victoria, and how she started the tradition of bridal white — it was very forward-thinking of her to break from tradition and wear what she wanted. So I was ok with doing that, myself.

Post # 12
Member
32 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2016

I too thought it was too intimate for our guests but our MC suggested that we make it funny instead by having the groom pull out a pair of funky boxers instead of a garter and throw it to the men. We’ll force them to put it on over top of their suit or something, just for laughs

Post # 13
Member
608 posts
Busy bee

I always find the whole garter thing awkward no matter how people try to do it. I’m not even wearing a garter I asked my Fiance and he doesn’t care about it so another thing to cross off my list!

Post # 14
Member
2156 posts
Buzzing bee

i don’t find the tradition awkward for reasons of retrieving the garter (after all, we all have sex, and it’s not like he’s finger banging her in the process. it’s a thigh – i have shorts that are much shorter than where any garter would be placed). but i do find the tossing of it awkward…the singling out of single guys and then having them fight for it. it’s weird. same with the bouquet toss. so we’re skipping both.

Post # 15
Member
877 posts
Busy bee

If you’ll both be embarrassed you don’t have to do it. We didn’t do it at our wedding. If you decide to do it, your husband doesn’t have to make such a huge show out of it like some people do. 

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