(Closed) garter toss.. WHY

posted 10 years ago in Waiting
Post # 32
1258 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I totally understand your annoyance.

Before we were engaged, DH and I were at a wedding and he caught the garter. He didn’t have to put it on the girl with the bouquet with his teeth, but everybody was goading him on to pull the garter on her leg as high as possible. Apparently, the more inches he pulls up the garter, the more years of happiness the bride and groom will have.

So there he was, my poor then-BF, trying to find the fine line between not seeming to wish the couple unhappiness and not p*****g me off for fumbling around another lady’s crotch.

Post # 33
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Yuck! I’ve never heard of the guy putting the garter on with his teeth. My family has always done the tradition where the guy who catches the garter puts it on the girl who catches the bouquet. But he’s always allowed to use his hands and usually just slips it on her ankle.

Where I live now, they just take pictures with the bride and groom.

Post # 34
1869 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Sh*t…thats worse than mine. Girl I do not deem clean caught the bouquet (I caught it fair and square and she wouldnt let go of it) they did a retoss and the bride launched it into the back of the room. Said girl took off running. Bride and Groom (my SO’s brother) know I’m waiting for the proposal from SO. SO catches the garter because I told him to iff I caught the bouquet. He missed the IFF part. They still made him put the garter on her. He was mortified and not happy. I took off to the bar for a beer.

Post # 35
587 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’ve been to several weddings and it’s pretty common to see the garter-catcher put the garter on the bouqet-catcher. But not with his teeth. That is kind of skeevy. I’ve caught the bouqet twice and have had the garter put on my leg (never more than an inch above the knee) but with hands that did not touch my skin, if they could help it. I would say that usually the guys have more sense than to man-handle a woman in the middle of a crowd, especially when her boyfriend is looking on from the sidelines. Luckily, my boyfriend is not the jealous type so he was cool with it, but I don’t know how I would feel if he were putting something on another woman!

And the whole tying his hands behind his back and blindfolding thing? WHAT? I have never heard of that. Ever. Weirdos.

Post # 36
7382 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

Ewww, after wearing my garter for most of the day I’m sure it was pretty sweaty.  Having your spouse use their teeth vs. a random relative/friend are 2 totally different things!  I wouldn’t really want to have someone’s garter put on my leg either.

Most of the weddings I’ve been to (as well as my own) have the people who caught the bouquet/garter have a dance together.  This way it still works if a kid catches the bouquet or garter.

Post # 37
4812 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

I despise the garter toss and many other “traditions” of that nature.  I just find them kind of cheesy. Therefore, they were not part of my wedding.

However, even I have never heard of the garter-catcher having to put it on the bouquet-catcher, never mind with his TEETH.  The most I have ever seen is some reluctant potential catchers, teasing of the actual catcher, and maybe some more-determined-than-necessary women very set on getting the bouquet. Maybe a picture of the catcher after? I have never even been at a wedding where the catchers had to dance together after or anything.

Post # 38
882 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

The only place I’ve ever heard of the guy who caught the garter putting it on the girl who caught the bouquet’s leg, is here on WB. I’ve only ever seen people catch both, and that was the end of it.

Post # 39
2200 posts
Buzzing bee

Wow, I learned so much from this thread! I didn’t know about the second half.

Post # 40
1075 posts
Bumble bee

I won’t be having this at my wedding. That’s awkward and embarrasing, and I honestly don’t want some of the first pictures of FH and I as husband and wife to be his face underneath my skirt.

However,  at the last wedding I attended (I was a bridesmaid, now-FI [BF at the time!] ) something very similar happened to us. I stood WAAAY away from where I knew the bouquet would be thrown, and it still came for me. So I ran away more lol. Then, BF caught the garter because it practically jumped into his hands. He turned beet red, as did I…and everyone began taking pictures of us. (We still weren’t engaged even though I knew he was buying the ring soon!) Gyah. That tradition sucks.

Post # 41
5708 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

I’m doing the garter auction (so f-ing tacky that people in my area actually like this) and bouquet toss to avoid drama with the in laws (I’ve had enough drama with these people). I most certainly will not be making them dance together. And honestly I don’t think I’m going to let Fiance take it off with his teeth. I’m not really into that PDA.

I can see how you would be mortified. I would request the pictures be taken down of you.

Post # 42
22 posts
  • Wedding: March 2013

We will not be doing the bouquet or garter toss at our wedding because we don’t want to and very few people at our wedding will be single, but I never understand why people get so upset about it – Relax a bit, it’s just for fun.  Also, I am sorry but no one can MAKE you do anything you don’t want to do, so if you or your fiance didn’t want to participate, you did not have to.  At my sister’s wedding, a gross 50+ year old man shoved younger guys out of the way to get the garter after my then 15-year old sister had shoved me out of the way for the bouquet – now THAT is inappropriate – although I think my sister got what she deserved for fighting me for the bouquet! 😉 

Post # 43
951 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@futuremrsgreenbean:  i would not have been happy if my BF had to put the garter on someone else with his teeth!!

 At my brothers wedding he didnt want that at all but his now wife did, so who ever caught the garter and the  bouquet just had pictures taken with the bride and groom. Also instead of him pulling her garter off with his teeth he pulled a huge pair of underwear out lol ( hes the funny one of the family) i actually enjoyed that better then seeing him pull her garter off haha

Post # 44
1722 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I know a lot of people love the bouquet and garter toss, but we chose not to do either at our wedding. I think it’s becoming more and more acceptable for people to skip both of them.

P.S. The whole “PUT IT ON WITH YOUR TEETH” thing is pretty weird. I’ve never seen that done before.

Post # 45
375 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@futuremrsgreenbean: …. what wedding did you go to?! I’m soo sorry! How mortifying for the both of you! That was so inappropriate to have another man do that outside of a drunken frat party, and in front of people he did not know! I’m so so so sorry. Hopefully you can just untag yourself/him and maybe unsubscribe to those people for awhile. *hugs* 

Post # 46
125 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

My family seems annoyed that I am skipping the garter toss and bouquet toss.  My bouquet will be mostly silk flowers, with a few real orchids.  I am keeping my bouquet.  Period.   Also, I put a lot of thought into buying a lovely garter that will go nicely with my dress.  I will leave it on.  Fiance can remove it in private, and it will be a keepsake.  I’m always uncomfortable at a wedding dance when the tosses are announced.  Fiance agrees with me and we are NOT doing these traditions. 

Does anyone else have family members who are complaining that they are skipping these (or other) traditions?

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