Post # 1
This is absolutely a personal choice and I TOTALLY respect each individual person’s decisions and opinions about it, but it’s on my mind a lot and I’d love your thoughts. I’m almost 14 weeks pregnant and starting to eye cute baby clothes. I’ve been an infant and early childhood teacher for YEARS and I gotta tell you, there’s nothing I love more than cutely dressed babies. Luckily they look adorable in everything, but here’s where it get’s trickier for me… I run in an EXTREMELY progressive circle in a very liberal city and have had many discussions with other parents in my circle who believe gendered baby clothes can be problematic. Without even thinking about it, we call baby girls “pretty and cute” and boys “strong and handsome” when they’ve only been alive a few days and I do think the clothes we dress our children in affect the way they are perceived, addressed and spoken about/to. I would probably steer away from really gendered slogans on clothing as much as possible, but it would be really fun to dress my baby girl in pink frills or my boy in little suspenders sometimes! My husband said “babe, just dress whichever gender child we have in pink tutus if you like them so much,” and I felt guilty, because I don’t know if I’m brave enough to dress my baby son in a tutu! I’m all for breaking down the gender binary and I will absolutely allow my son to wear a tutu if he asks to once he can chose his own clothes or my daughter to wear suspenders and never put on a dress if she doesn’t want to, but before our children can make those decisions for themselves, how do we navigate this? (Again, I genuinely respect whatever you choose to dress your precious babe in and have no judgments to offer. I’ve just never had to think about this for myself before and now I’m in quarantine and over-thinking it! lol.)
Post # 2
Dress your baby how you want, Mama 💖 💞
Post # 3
You dress your baby how YOU want to. Period. If you want a girl in frilly tutus and a boy in suspenders? Do it. If you want either gender in strictly gender neutral clothes? Do it. If you want your boy dressed in pink and girl dressed in a button down with bow ties? Do it. There is absolutely no right or wrong here. None of the above decisions can harm or negatively affect your baby. He/she doesn’t know any better! I was dressed in stereotypically girlie clothes as well as boy clothes cause my parents were broke as hell when I was a baby and bought whatever was on clearance. I label myself a female today and wearing boy or girl clothes as a baby had zero impact on me.
Im all for a progressive society and definitely think we have made great leaps in necessary areas. But this is a “progression” I find beyond dumb and ridiculous. Yes, we should make it acceptable for a baby to wear anything. No, we should not go as far as making gendered clothing and nurseries and items inherently negative.
ETA: I’ve never looked at a baby boy and thought “strong” or “handsome” lol. Or looked at a baby girl and thought “pretty”. Those just seem like very… mature terms for a baby? I can imagine using those words to describe a toddler sure, but babies are only ever “cute” or “adorable” to me. Maybe I’m just weird like that 🤔😅
Post # 4
I say follow your gut. I think if I had a girl I’d dress her in anything and everything, but probably wouldn’t dress a boy in what have been traditiionallly thought of as “girl” clothes (though any color would be fine). If my boy told me he wanted to wear dresses one day, I wouldn’t get in his way. But that’s just me, I wouldn’t judge anyone for feeling more or less traditional on this so long as they let their kid choose/reject items when she/he is old enough to express her/his preferences.
Post # 5
This might not be PC, but I wanted people to be able to tell my baby was a boy or a girl. Yes, it can change how people react to them, but unless you take extreme measures, almost everyone who regularly interacts with the baby will know whether s/he is a boy or girl anyway. You do you. There’s nothing to feel guilty about regarding how you dress your baby.
Post # 6
You really have to live life the way you want to. You don’t want to get out of this circle one day, look back and realize you were never being true to yourself. I have been there and done it, and it can take years to undo the damage of having made choices based on how everyone else thinks things should be or how I should be or the choices I make in my life. Always be you and you’ll always attract the right people, but I’d like to say it really doesn’t matter and choices shouldn’t be about whether it will do that or not. Raise your kids however you want. Dress them however you want.
Post # 7
Dress your child how you want but obviously with the understanding that as they get older they might say no. I think I was about 2 when I put my foot down and told my grandmother I wasn’t wearing dresses anymore. My feminist mother was very proud of me. I don’t mind wearing them now but alas as a kid I was so against dressing girlish.
Personally I’m not crazy about overly gendered stuff but that’s coz babies are babies. They just need to be comfy that’s all. Everything else is all for our own amusement.
Post # 8
When your child is old enough to express his/her/their preferences he/she/they will make them known and it sounds as if you will respect them. Until then don’t lose too much sleep over it.
Post # 9
Lol I felt the same about gender neutral and was determined to only buy gender neutral stuff. Then I found out I was having a baby girl and I lost all control. I don’t care … baby girl clothes are so damn cute, sue me. Honestly someone’s always gonna have an opinion… your woke friends may judge you for “gendering” your kid at all, while conservative family members will have a fit if you get your baby boy a pink sleep sack cause it happened to be cheaper in that color. It’s ridiculous. Just do what you want and try to tune out all the noise !
Post # 10
Dress your baby how you want! But I totally say baby boys are pretty all the time! I just told a friend a week or so ago how pretty his little boy was because he was! I told him he could be a baby doll! That being said, if I had a baby girl then I couldn’t resist dressing her up in cute frilly things either.
Post # 11
If your really that concerned just dress your baby in gender neutral outfits. Even though a baby isn’t going to remember it, your kidding yourself if you think things will have radically changed enough (or ever) by the time your baby boy is grown up enough to see the photos that he’ll be happy you dressed him in a tutu. Also do we really call baby boys strong and handsome? Most babies I see are referred to as “oh he/she’s beautiful” or “what a cutie”. Is anyone really like, “what a masculine striking baby boy that is” lol.
Srsly do people this woke really exist? If so, wow, it sounds like a comedy parody of the super liberal to me.
Post # 12
- Wedding: Malibou Lake Mountain Club
i bought some pink items for my son because those were the only things on his size. And honestly, its all fine. People have confused him as a girl, and at times he likes to choose dolls. He is only 2, and i just want him to know its fine to like the colors because of what they are; not to be defined. and honestly, no matter what, people will talk about you and your parenting nonetheless sadly. Just do what feels right for you and your kiddo.
Post # 13
It doesn’t even matter anyway: people constantly think my daughter is a boy, and oftentimes she’s wearing dresses and bows. I assume it’s bc she’s bald?
Post # 14
Ha! This happened with my son, too. He was bald, and I dressed him in blue – often with suspenders! And still, people would call him a beautiful baby girl. My daughter had just enough hair on the top of her head to hold a bow, and I would put her in dresses, and people would call her a boy. In other words, it almost doesn’t matter how you dress the baby; people sometimes need a flashing neon sign to see them as a boy or girl anyway.
Post # 15
We dress our daughter everyway. Lots of cutesy dresses but tons of gender neutral and boy stuff that was handed down. They look so perfect in everything!