- 5 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
April of last year, future Mr. Crackerjaxx proposed and I immediately went out and bought a dress (impulsive…I know) without a whole lot of second, third and fourth opinions about the dress. But I felt so pretty and ready to be a bride. Then as I browsed through all the photographs of me trying on dresses it hit me, I thought “Ohhhh boy”. I’ve been trying to get “in shape” for the last 5 years…the same old 20 lbs. These 20 lbs weren’t there when we first started going out (about 8 years ago), and I noticed my puffy arms, puffy face, belly bulge and muffin tops off of the straples dresses…but I also noticed that throwing around gallon jugs of water were heavy, 2 flights of stairs left me winded, standing around too long left my back achey…welcome 30’s!
My weightloss adventures typically begin with great enthusiasm. I throw out all the junk, put together the meal plans, get all the meals prepared, then go watch tv…. A few weeks ago it started to dawn on me that losing weight really isn’t about losing weight, it’s about embracing a new lifestyle. It’s about getting out of my comfort zone and being, well, uncomfortable.
The last 4 weeks, I’ve been working out about 2 times a week (it’s a start!) and cutting back on my bad eating habits…Baby steps. I haven’t lost any weight, but I feel awesome. It’s encouraging to simply feel strong…Like opening the salsa jar all by myself. I also noticed that work stressors don’t stress me out as much as they did, in fact, just yesterday I decided that instead of taking my complaints and worries home to Mr. Crackerjaxx, I went to the gym and ran as fast and has hard for as long as I could, then did as many pushups as I could. Let me tell you, what a relief! When I got home, let’s just say that a non-whiney Ms. Crackerjaxx was a very appealing enticement for some team cardio.
Point is. Your body, my body, IS beautiful and always has been, always will be. But taking a step back and realizing that if I want to be mentally sharp and limber like my 86 year old grandmother, I better get off these buns to shape these buns (she still walks 4 miles everyday!) At 86, she’s probably one of the healthiest little ladies I know, and takes almost ZERO medication, but she’s also a happy little plump pear shape lady who loves to cook.
I don’t have any children yet, but developing healthy habits now puts me at ease that I’ll be able to pass them down when we’re ready. Of course I want to be gorgeous on my wedidng day, but now it’s not so much to be thin to fit in my new dress (yes I bought another one 🙂 thanks Mom), it’s about making sure I give myself and Mr. Crackerjaxx a healthy, happy start.
Doesn’t mean I won’t complain that I can’t get these last 20 lbs off! Haha!