Post # 32
We got a lot of clothes and I was actually glad. I mean our baby needs to be clothed… right?! I didn’t have to buy any clothes for her yet, and won’t until she’s one and a half probably.
I see nothing wrong with taking things back though. Use that money to buy what you need. Just don’t tell people that. You can still write a nice, thoughtful thank you note and lie about how much you love the gift, and will get a lot of use out of it, and it’s perfect for your little one 🙂
Post # 33
You could always do word of mouth that if ppl really want to buy clothes to maybe spread it out a bit & not all buy 0-3m or 3-6m stuff, kids grow fast and it never hurts to have larger sizes.
I never had this problem though, I guess peeps on both sides of the family are smart ;p because if we did get a 0-3m outfit as a gift it usually came paired with a 8-12m outfit, book or other baby item. To be perfectly honest we got so much variation we didn’t have to buy our son anything other than footwear & outer wear until he was about 2.5yrs.
Post # 34
@heathaah:No polite way to do it. Just only register for non-clothes stuff? And then people who want to buy clothes will, but people who want to go off your registry won’t.
FWIW I only buy 12mo clothes for baby showers because I’m insane.
Post # 35
@artbee:Oh, and this. Just thank them for what they did get you. Return it after you logged all the items.
Post # 36
i think the only way to combat that would be putting cheaper things on your registry, like bottles and soothies, burp rags, etc. there is no polite way to ask that people not get you clothes!
Post # 37
Mrs. Spring’s ideas are fantastic! They might help a bit.
For what it’s worth, we did a few things people are mentioning here, and it didn’t matter. We had a registry with items in lots of different price ranges, we asked our moms to spread the word that we didn’t need baby clothes, and we put a few clothing items on the registry so people could buy those if they REALLY wanted to buy clothes– or at least they’d know that we wanted just basic stuff. It didn’t matter. We still got tons of clothes; lots and lots of clothes.
Just look at the shower as a chance to celebrate the baby, and count on getting lots of clothes. Just roll with it. Don’t count on people to use the registry– if they do, it’s a bonus. People just aren’t into baby registries the way they’re into wedding registries.
Post # 38
I wouldnt even show up if someone indicated that they dont want me to do this or that. You make a registry and yea it is annoying when people dont follow it, but you should just be happy and content with the fact that 1. they showed up to support you and 2. they got you something nice for the baby or for you.
Put a happy face on and thank everyone for what they get you, and if the same thing happens to you that happened to your sister, return the stuff and get what you need.
Thank you notes should not be difficult at all. Thank them for the lovely and thoughtful gift and be done with it.
Post # 39
You seem to have gotten a lot of good suggestions, so here’s one that’s not really related:
My husband and I kept a big spreadsheet of who gave us what gift, and we also included the price and the link to the item online (if it was off our registry or from the same store). That helped us with thank you notes, since we did end up returning quite a bit of stuff.
If you’re going to keep the gender a secret, don’t register for the bedding you want. Register for neutral bedding and then just exchange it after the shower. But make sure the store where you’re registering has a liberal return policy. We went with Buy Buy Baby because of that reason and it has made our lives so much easier — especially now that baby girl is here.
Good luck and enjoy your pregnancy!
Post # 40
@AlbanianBride27: No, no, no!! You make it sound like I am ungrateful! That isn’t the case at all, which is why I stated that I don’t think there is a polite way to ask this. Like I said, I will appreciate anything anyone does for me. I only ask because of two reasons. One, I saw how difficult it was for my very pregnant sister to run around returning things. And two, I feel TERRIBLE returning something that I know someone took the time to pick out especially for us. It breaks my heart. How can I return the outfits my grandma/best friend/mother-in-law spent time choosing so I can get myself a plastic baby tub or something?? I don’t want to waste anyone’s time or money, and I don’t want to look them in the eye and tell them how much I love having yet another onsie in size 0-3 with a monkey on it! I have a tough time when people spend money on me (guilt, I can’t explain it) so it is worse when it is stuff I don’t really need.
I think having the moms casually mention it is our best bet so far.
Post # 41
If someone asks ‘what do you need’ I see nothing wrong with answering honestly. It might not be something to put in an invitation though.
Post # 42
@heathaah: “How can I return the outfits my grandma/best friend/mother-in-law spent time choosing so I can get myself a plastic baby tub or something??”
And somehow I have a feeling that grandma/best friend/mother-in-law will at some point expect to see baby in the outfit they bought.
I think people just love to buy baby clothes over practical stuff, because they are cuter, and they want to see the baby looking cute in the outfit they picked out. I don’t think with baby showers, many people actually give much thought to what the parents really need, it’s more about the fun of buying adorable baby stuff. Who doesn’t walk through the baby aisle thinking “Ooh, what a cute onsie/sleeper/dress?” It’s just not the same shopping experience with bottle warmers or diaper genies.
I think having the moms casually mention it is not a bad idea. I used to be on team baby clothes, because it’s fun buying them and it never occurred to me that the parents might not need as many of them. I honestly thought that clothes were a perfectly useful and welcome gift.