- 4 years ago
Firstly, I want to start off with saying that I love my BFF… she’s the type of person to always be there for you and always a shoulder to cry on. We’ve had an on-and-off relationship since middle school but have always remained friends through our ups-and-downs.
Recently, I’ve been getting very annoyed with her. In my life, I’m happily dating my dream guy, living with him and on my own for the first time, just got a puppy with him and we do talk about the future. I’m happy and only want her to find what I have so I listen to her disaster dating stories and try to give her advice on when she’s dating a jerk. I tell her with love that she shouldn’t waste her time because he’ll end up hurting her to which she laughs, says she knows he’s different and then BOOM – I was right. Then I get to hear the sobs of another dating disaster. Up until now, I’ve been very patient and do the usual “yeah, I didn’t see it coming either” but I’m getting fed up. This has happened more than once, I should add. Sometimes, with the same guy!
On another note, she’s also having a mid-life crisis (if that’s possible at 25) but she is. When we graduated, she went straight to work and has been for the past 7 years at the same place. Now, she realizes that she wants to go to school but not sure what to take. I’ve been through school and know how difficult it can be, of course I told her to make sure its something you want to do. The last thing you want when you’re 25 is to take something you’re not even interested in and then end up dropping out and losing the money. She agreed.
Low and behold, the current job she has is laying her off in a couple months… PERFECT OPPORTUNITY in the sense that the government (in Canada) will pay for a good portion of her schooling. However, instead of taking this opportunity she’s decided to find another job and then go back to school later. The government won’t pay now (unless its student loans) and she will have to quit this new job to go back to school when her current job is lost anyway so the time and money is there! I’ve told her this many times and she’s just refusing to see how good she has it. If I were laid off and the government would pay for a course I wanted to take, OF COURSE I’d grab that opportunity. Yes, it sucks to lose your job but if you were planning on going back to school anyways, why not now? QUIT WASTING TIME!
I don’t know how to talk to her anymore because all she does is complain about how hard her life is… except it isn’t and she’s one of the most fortunate people I know. She has great parents who allow her to live at home rent-free, a good paying job up until now, good savings account and an opportunity that any student in post-secondary education would kill for! I admit she’s lost and as her friend, it is my duty to listen to her vent but I can’t anymore especially when she’s not accepting help or advice from anyone. She’s stuck in a rut and she’s the only one who can get out of it but she just can’t see it or won’t admit it.
My biggest fear is that she’ll be 35 and still living at home with her parents and still unsure about where her life is going. I know that there are many people like that out there today but its sad. It’s their own fault and these people need to grow up and grow the balls to take that leap into the real world. I’ve told her this and sadly, she agrees but continues to live in the rut.
Has anyone else had a friend like this? What would you do?