(Closed) Getting around the "walking down the aisle" tradition

posted 5 years ago in Traditions
Post # 3
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I like the idea and obviously it makes sense because you’re walking down with your dad, but it’s kind of a weird combo initially for your mom and his dad to go together.

Maybe your mom and his dad could be seated traditionally, and then he escorts his mother and your dad esscorts you?

I mean, it’s not that much different, but it might feel kind of awkward for the two of them. And people that won’t know your parents may not know who’s who.

Post # 4
1846 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I like the first scenario, that happened at the Jewish ceremony you mentioned. Are you sure your parents won’t go for that? I think that’s very sweet.

Post # 5
4523 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@FortiesFlare:  +1

@sweet5k:  Would your dad be open to your groom walking you down the aisle? That’s what we are doing.

Post # 6
3697 posts
Sugar bee

Most people aren’t aware of this, but it’s actually a much older tradition to have the bride and groom walk in together. Most of the other variations (groom waiting at the end of the aisle, bride escorted by her father, etc.) didn’t really become widespread until the Victorian era. Before that, they were done here and there as local traditions, but it wasn’t like everyone everywhere did the processional the same way.

In our processional, we had the Bridal Party walk, followed by his parents, then my parents, then us. Worked great and everyone was happy.

ETA: the father giving the bride away isn’t a “Christian” tradition at all. The Christian view of marriage is as a spritual partnership (and, in some traditions, a sacrament), and bride and groom walking in together was the tradition of the Early Church. Giving the bride away is rooted in a socioeconomic view of marriage that sees the bride as property transferred from the father to the husband. This view existed in many countries that eventually became Christianized, and the tradition persisted as existing practices were fused with Christian rites, and it continues to be used in many weddings that take place in Christian churches, but it is not an inherently Christian practice any more than the Unity candle or throwing rice/birdseed or carrying flowers. It’s another secular practice that gets overlaid on a Christian ritual.

Post # 7
4336 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I really like the idea of walking in from both sides with your families!

I also want to add- not many people know this, but the TRULY traditional Catholic way to walk in is for both the bride and groom to walk in together, either escorted by their parents, or just them. (That’s what the official Catholic wedding ritual book says, if anyone is interested…) I’m Catholic and also do not like the symbolism of being “given away” by my father, which is why that is actually not the proper “Catholic” way to do it. Just thought you might be interested to know that even not all Christians think that is the best way to do it!

Post # 8
4336 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@KCKnd2:  lol, cross-posting…

Post # 11
1304 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

My husband walked with his mom — his father had passed away — and then I followed with my parents, one on each arm.


Post # 12
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I see nothing wrong with what you’re planning on doing. In fact, I’ve seen this done at several weddings when there is no side entrance. 

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