(Closed) Getting married before an older sibling?

posted 10 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 32
Member
298 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

My half brother (16 years older than I am) has been married and divorced twice, before I even met Fiance.  Now we’re both engaged at the same time!  First wedding for me, third for him.

Post # 33
Member
966 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

My sister is nearly 6 year younger than me and was married 2 years ago (she just turned 24 at the time).  I’ll be married one week after her 3 year anniversary (I’ll be 32).  Fortunately our family never put any pressure on either one of us to get married, nor did they point out that she was getting married first.  However I did wind up in the bathroom crying my eyes out for a solid 10 min in between the ceremony and reception.  🙂

Post # 34
Member
7052 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

My sis did before I did and it was all good!  I was totally into helping her and had no ill feelings or anything really…just happy for her!

I had a blast planning her bachelorette party and the tales of after and what happened that night still resonate almost two decades later! (we met the Chippendales dancers that night and they bought US all the food and drinks at a popular piano bar).  They were really nice and off duty and had a blast hanging with us.  Our pictures have gone down in bachelorette history and all of us gals who attended still have that souvenier of the famous night.

Post # 35
Member
23 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2011

my younger brother got married before me.  It didn’t bother me in the least, because:

-I’m on the young-side-of-average for marriage, so I don’t have any “Christmas cake” issues.  My brother and his wife were a young groom and young bride (total outliers). 

-When their wedding took place, my fiance and I had been engaged for a while.  I think this was key to not being insecure about a younger sibling married first.  If I’d been between relationships at their wedding I would have (secretly) been a ball of emo.

-My brother and SIL had been dating since they were teenagers!  I don’t see them getting married first as “cutting in line” because of the length of their relationship.

-They totally love one another, and it’s so cute!  Even if I’d been 40 and brought my cat for a date, I was just too busy that night being happy for them to think about myself.

 

Also, I”m guessing a younger sister getting married first is different than a younger brother getting married first.

Post # 36
Member
850 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I am getting married before my older sister, although she was engaged before I was (and broke it off). We’re not really close, but I know it was a sensitive subject for her, so I’m not really sure how she feels… she has been rather distant.

Post # 37
Member
52 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I was married before an older sister. I think it would be weird if I was really young or if she even cared about that sort of thing. She liked help plan a wedding since she had no plans of her own anytime soon.

Post # 38
Member
432 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

My much older sister  was married in her late 20’s, but she’s long divorced and came out to us a few years ago, she is in a long-term relationship with her partner.

 

My older brother is 27 and has been with his girlfriend nearly as long as my fiance and I have been, they are nowhere near engaged…he’s not ready for marriage.

 

I am the baby at 25

Post # 39
Member
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

My brother (he’s 3 years younger) got engaged and married before me.  He proposed to his now wife after they had been dating for 5 years; I had only just started dating my Fiance at the time, so there was no way I could be angry, jealous, or upset about that!

Post # 40
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

i am about to turn 28, and my fiance will turn 26 days after our wedding.  he has an older sister (29) who isn’t married. 

Post # 41
Member
125 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Well, I won’t have sibling problems, but my older cousing (by about four years) has a problem with it. She has been with her BF now for four years, and I have been with my Fiance for two. She told me one day to not get married before her, and it sounded like a threat lol. But, I got engaged and she hasn’t really talked to me since. She thinks I’m too young (I’m 21, she’s 25). Although, if it was her, she would have been the one getting married at 21, too. Eh, it’s awkward, but if you know it’s right, it’s right.

Post # 42
Member
40 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2011

My older sister is 29 and I’m 28. My sister was engaged a few years back they broke up.

Post # 43
Member
2192 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I feel like its only a big deal if you make it that way.  I am the last to get married out of 3 girls.  I am the middle child.

A friend of mine was angry her younger sister got married before her.  Called me crying with anger, not happiness.  Her being resentful did not make for the funnest wedding environment.

In this day and age I think it doesn’t matter.  And if someone makes a fuss over it gently re-direct them to more postiive thoughts. 🙂

 

Post # 44
Member
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I’m the first to get married, and I’m the middle of 3–I’m 25; sister’s 27, and brother is 8.  For what it’s worth, my sister hasn’t had a boyfriend since she was 15, so no one is shocked that I’m marrying before her. 

Post # 45
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2012

My sister and I are 2.5 years apart. I am the youngest. She was engaged before me and planned to get married before me, but her wedding keeps getting pushed back and is getting really close to my March 2012 wedding but she is making sure that her’s comes first. To me it doesn’t matter but it seems to be very important for the older sister to get married first to her. I think it has something to do with always doing things before me… driving, high school, graduating , and moving out.

Post # 46
Member
232 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Im getting married before my 3 older siblings! I have an older sister and it was weird talking about my Fiance and wedding in front of her..I know she was a little sensitive about it because she has been wanting to get married 🙁 It makes me a little sad honestly but I know she cant help her feelings

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