Post # 1
Two weeks ago, we went to a wedding of two of our dear friends. My fiance and I have been engaged since February and pretty actively looking for our wedding venue since then. We have not been able to find anyhting we really like and/or that fits within our budget. From the minute we arrived at this wedding two weeks ago, we were both in love with the venue. Trying not to get our hopes up, we waited to hear back from the venue. Surprisingly, it is within our budget! The first venue we have found like that.
Is it wrong for us to want to get married in a venue our friends got married in? They just recently got back from their honeymoon, but I don’t want to approach them to ask until a little more time has passed. We’re not in a HUGE rush to put a deposit down (they have plenty of dates open for next year). Any advice? I won’t event approach it and will move on if it is not the right hting to do.
Post # 2
Honestly, I’d say go for it. They get one day, maybe the month – to be nice. But since you won’t be getting married until next year, I personally don’t think there’s anything wrong with booking what seems to be the perfect venue for you!
Post # 3
It doesnt matter AT. ALL. More than one human is allowed to use a wedding venue! Dont even ask “permission” from your friend. Just book it. Next time you see them you say “your wedding was so beautiful! We loved the venue. Looks like well be getting married there too- save the date X/XX!”
If they get petty about it thats their problem. You just say “im sorry you feel that way! There are only so many venue options in town. Great minds think alike”.
Post # 4
Absolutely not! They don’t own the venue plus, unless you live in a big city, alot of towns have limited venues. My cousins who are brother and sister got married 1 week apart in the same wedding Venue. It was abit like ground hog day but no one was bothered by it.
Post # 5
Why not? It’s a huge compliment to your friends that you love where they got married. It’s not like they told you and then you got married there before them.
Post # 6
I’ve been to three weddings at the same venue in the same group of friends. No one got upset over it, and they all had great weddings. I don’t see it as an issue.
Post # 7
In 2008, on the verge of breaking up with my then-boyfriend, I attended my friends’ wedding at a stunning venue. I knew I was about to be out of a relationship, but I told myself if I ever did get married, this place was EXACTLY what I wanted. That Boyfriend or Best Friend and I did split up, but I never forgot my friends’ wedding….
Last year, my now-DH and I got married there! My friends were thrilled for us, and even more thrilled that we loved their venue so much that I’d been in love with it for years. They were very flattered!
Post # 8
How much of a crossover do you think they’ll be in terms of guest list? I would certainly have a chat with your friend – if i were them, i would be thrilled that you loved their choice so much but you cant predict how people will feel… i would make a point of letting them know that in terms of styling, you will aim to be different so not everything will be a copy of their special day. Hope everything works out the way you hope!
Post # 9
100% ok and reall you don’t need to ask, though it’s nice to let them know once you’ve booked.
She doesn’t own the venue.
Post # 10
cubiebee: Ooh good question and good point. That’s actually what I am nervous about (but I didn’t realize that until you asked it!)
Our friends are both a part of DF’s co-ed fraternity meaning almost all of the Groom’s guest will overlap. So maybe 30 people at most?
Post # 11
Not at all – it’s a compliment. I’m sure when you speak to them about it they will be thrilled.
Post # 12
If this were a rule and if we were getting married locally, we wouldn’t be able to have a reception considering there are only 3 decent venues in town…
Post # 13
Personally, I can be a little petty. My close friend group is very small and in a city as big as mine I would be a little annoyed to find out it was the same venue, because I’m really only close to a few girls and they have hundreds of options…
That being said I also would understand I was being petty and wouldn’t let that ruin anything anyway. Id eye roll and huff and puff for 20 minutes and then get over it. But being asked about it first would be my strong preference.
Post # 14
futureseh: just book it! We had a family member love our wedding venue so much that she booked it for an event for her temple – we were very flattered!
Post # 15
I don’t understand how this could even be a question of offending anyone? We’re getting married at a venue 2 of our friends have used, and one of them even set up the meeting for us since she knows the owners, it honestly didn’t occur to me that anyone would be offended we’re using a venue that’s been used before in our social circle. And I certainly wouldn’t mind if someone attending our wedding liked the venue enough to use it themselves, we don’t have Perpetual Dibs on it lol.