Getting Over Disappointment with Wedding

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
629 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2019

That really sucks bee, dont feel bad for feeling this way! It’s supposed to be this perfect day and when you spend years and thousands in money making sure it is, and something like that happens, it’s natural to feel totally disappointed! 

I don’t have much advise I guess but to just think of how wonderful it was to marry him, and to think of all the future celebrations that you both will share, that hopefully, will not be as such a mishap!


Post # 3
5123 posts
Bee Keeper

I’m so sorry. You are literally the first person I’ve seen complain about her wedding on this site WITH DUE CAUSE.

There’s nothing You can do but try not to think of it and leave it behind you. My husband would say you’re “pre-disastered” so everything ought to be smooth from now on.


Post # 4
7559 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

 I think you need a little reality check. Of course it’s disappointing to have worked so hard in planning the exact wedding you wanted, only to have it all changed at the last minute. Anyone would be disappointed in that.  But you also caught several lucky breaks and got a lot of help from your venue because not too many people would have been able to move their entire rehearsal and wedding to new locations practically overnight.  No one could have predicted that your wedding would have been upended by gas explosions (seriously that was some crazy stuff), but it was, and somehow these people at your venue managed to find you a big enough space that wasn’t already occupied, and shift all your food, china, servers, the whole shebang– on just a few hours notice. Probably while some of those folks were struggling with shifting their families to hotels because they lived in the No Entry zone, too.   You didn’t get the wedding you had envisioned, but you also didn’t get left high and dry, and you should at least spend a moment being impressed with how well things worked out, despite all the odds. 

Nobody’s wedding is perfect. Everyone has a ton of little details that go wrong and drive us crazy. But most of us don’t have a small army of people behind the scenes working to take a bad situation and make it as less-bad as possible. Be happy for the magic they worked.

Post # 5
8367 posts
Bumble Beekeeper


View original reply
sunburn :  You are literally the first person I’ve seen complain about her wedding on this site WITH DUE CAUSE.

Yes! And OP, I think you handled yourself better than I probably would have. Luckily my husband is the calmer more rational one of us and would have handled it just like yours did! He sounds like a real keeper! 

I’m so sorry you had to go through all that, and pull it off in mere hours! I agree with horseradish as well – a HUGE part of even having your wedding is all the employees who were also probably going through hell at the time. I think keeping them in mind is a great way to build perspective on the situation. 

I say for your 1st anniversary – take a vacation and get some cute beach pictures! 

Post # 6
3089 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2021

Don’t feel bad about having the feelings you are having about this. I totally get why you feel so disappointed. You paid $20k for a beautiful venue and then had  to scramble at the last second for something second tier and even more money. The venue handled the situation very poorly and I’d make sure that was reflected in any reviews…. 

Post # 7
1480 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2019

Wow OP, you’re much better than I am because I probably would’ve taken the refund. You don’t sound ungrateful for what the country club tried to arrange but I am shocked they charged you extra for the covers. 

You have the right attitude and every reason to be upset. A year from now you’ll probably be laughing about how your marriage started with a bang. Literally! I hope that getting out your feelings helps you move on from this disappointment. It sounds like you and your husband need to take that beach vacation/honeymoon. 

Post # 8
352 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

Oh my goodness, this must have been so stressful! And of course you are justified in wishing you had the wedding of choice and being disappointed about the details. But I have to say, I expected this story to end so much worse than it did. It’s pretty amazing that your ceremony was unaffected and you still got to have your celebration with all your people and food and dancing, and were able to have fun! You could have so easily been in a position of having to send all your out of town guests home with no event. This is actually an amazing success story of a wedding persevering despite the odds, and something to be proud of! 

Post # 9
847 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2019

I’m so sorry be.  That sounds incredibly disappointing and not how anyone would have expected their wedding day going and I’m sure it was even worse since this was not necessarily the wedding you wanted to begin with.  Since your original dream was an intimate, destination wedding, could you plan for a vow renewal for just the two of you on your one year anniversary?

Post # 10
3008 posts
Sugar bee

I’m so sorry Bee. Honestly though, from what could have been a TOTAL disaster, I think just a few small things were “ruined”. For example, I feel like most people don’t sign the guestbook. That’s awesome you were still able to have your wedding 🙂 

Post # 11
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2020 - City, State

Oh man, I’m so sorry someone said you need a reality check. You SO do not. Man,you were dealt a bad hand, but as you have great perspective, you are married to your guy!! AND your guy could have flew off the handle, but he was a true gentleman through this, and you were graceful. As much as all of this stinks, maybe you two can have a nice 10-year celebration with the glam you deserve!! Congratulations and best wishes!! 

Post # 12
228 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

You planned for a year and everything you planned went away and you were hit with basically a surprise spur of the moment wedding. I would be completely disappointed as well. Yes things happen in life but that doesn’t take away or diminish the disappointment you would feel from it. I don’t know why this other bee decided you didn’t have a right to your emotions, I suggest ignoring that post.

i would try to think of it this way, no matter what comes now, you know your marriage can withstand a whole lot of change!

Post # 13
2373 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: NJ

Go see a psychiatrist and a shark of a lawyer, who can build a case for your mental breakdown over this shitshow. 

Then sue the living hell out of everybody who had anything to do with it. 

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